Carl Sigman - Frontier Psychiatrist lyrics

[Intro] [Horse whinnies] "Is Dexter ill? Is Dexter ill? Is Dexter ill? Is Dexter ill today?" "No, Mr. Kirk, Dexter's in school." "I'm afraid he's not, Miss Fishpaw. Dexter's truancy problem is way out of hand. The Baltimore County School Board have decided to expel Dexter from the entire public school system." "Oh, Mr. Kirk, I'm as upset as you to learn of Dexter's truancy, but surely, expulsion is not the answer!" "I'm afraid expulsion is the only answer! It's the opinion of the entire staff that Dexter is criminally insane, sane, sane, sane" [Hook] That boy needs therapy Psychosomatic That boy needs therapy Purely psychosomatic That boy needs therapy Lie down on the couch, what does that mean? You're a nut! You're crazy in the coconut! What does that mean? That boy needs therapy I'm gonna k** you, that boy needs therapy Ranagazoo, let's have a tune Now when I count three That, that, that, that, that boy, boy needs therapy He was white as a sheet And he also made false teeth [Verse 1] (Avalanche is above, business continues below) Did I ever tell you the story about Cowboys, m-m-midgets, the Indians and fron-frontier psychiatrist? I-I felt strangely hypnotised I was in another world, a world of 20,000 girls And milk rectangles to an optometrist, the man with the golden eyeball And tighten your bu*tocks, pour juice on your chin I promise my girlfriend I'd (play) the violin, violin, violin [Refrain] Frontier psychiatrist Frontier, frontier, frontier, frontier psychiatrist Frontier, frontier, frontier, frontier psychiatrist Frontier, frontier, frontier, frontier psychiatrist Frontier, frontier, frontier, frontier psychiatrist [Hook] That boy needs therapy Psychosomatic That boy needs therapy Purely psychosomatic That boy needs therapy Lie down on the couch, what does that mean? You're a nut! You're crazy in the coconut! What does that mean? That boy needs therapy I'm gonna k** you, that boy needs therapy Ranagazoo, let's have a tune Now when I count three That, that, that, that, that boy, boy needs therapy He was white as a sheet And he also made false teeth [Refrain] Frontier psychiatrist [Verse 2] Can you think of anything else that talks oth-other than a person? A-a-a bird? Yeah Sometimes, a parrot talks Hello, hello, hello, hello Hello, hello, hello, hello Yes, some birds are funny when they talk Can you think of anything else? Um, a record, record, record, record? [Horse whinnies]