Cardiak - All In My Head lyrics

[Intro: Joe Budden] Loose Quarter Few questions I ask myself [Verse 1: Joe Budden] Maybe it started with Slaughterhouse Or was it tour life Maybe it wouldn't had started at all If I had your life Maybe it was needed or I was thinking immorally If I wasn't myself could I say I gave the fans All of Me Can't decide if I'm more ashamed of what they saw of me Than I am of ignoring all the lessons that was taught to me Headed up field but couldn't dodge the last tackler How could a forward thinker move so a**-backwards How could a dude with no regrets at all Willing to bet it all, not realize that quicker demise How could I neglect it all I'm so seasonal, some of y'all knew I'd spring back With a heart this cold How'd y'all think I'd be receptive to fall I'm plenty comfortable when danger's around And even more so when stranger's around And the bigger picture is sicker Don't know my triggers or know the alarm it forces Don't know a n***a Don't know my bouts with d** and liquor or the harm it causes Life or d**h, I tried to lynch myself Thought I could keep it all a secret, I convinced myself But really, the folk that loved me They could tell I was locin' I couldn't see him Cry me a river cause it fell in the ocean Numb to my words now, maybe felt I was open I cut so many people loose, do I need help with devotion That's just some of the things I ask my Lord and Savior And when He calls for me, will He have done us all a favor [Hook: Kobe] How did I make it here Who are y'all I feel so lost Now I'm not seeing it clear Is it my fault It's all in my head [Verse 2: Royce Da 5'9"] I'm looking around like this can't be happening Round of applause for the angry rappers Lord, my girl cried me a flood then me a river That's love, depending on me when I'm independent on liquor I'm up in the shoe store, she got no love to show You ever look at a b**h you was f**ing behind your b**h back Like f** I was f**ing you for I'm an artist so I'm intelligent I would tell you to do some soul searching But it's hanging up in my closet with your skeleton It's gotta be a God's work Even a diamond gotta be polished first A quarter's on the loose And I ain't been out here getting my dollars worth I had to remove the goggles first To see through the sipping Patrón And fifty phoners for I need to go get me a kidney donor Guru, Nate Dogg, go ahead blink an eye Your doctor told me you close, go head drink and die Buried under the stone where the Patrón fifth sits by That reads, here lies somebody who never wanted to be THIS guy [Hook] [Verse 3: Joe Budden] They say knowledge is power Great cause every day I learn As of late been having revelations bout this hate term Hate the way they judge me Till I got the case adjourned Hated the belly of the beast Till I became its tapeworm When I said I'd stop getting high Tried to say it stern Now, I'm the type to walk through the fire to check the way it burn They say my brain is off I say how can it be If I'm out my mind, how can I be in-sanity The people used to say that I was scared of progress They don't know how hard a n***a tried to advance But I don't know who's more to blame Is it them for really not knowin' me Or is it me for never really giving them a chance Get too close, be too big of a threat Now it's been little to no time Thinking why I ain't get rid of you yet Gotta recognize my maturity Gotta see I'm grown Let all my skeletons out the closet Just so I'd never be alone Since I got trust issues I won't discuss with you Besides God tell me who the f**'s supposed to save you Pop won't have a man-to-man Was gone half my life so Somewhere in his head probably feel it ain't his place to Plus more people will see me soon I mean I'll be on national TV soon So when I ask if people I have around are a cancer for me That's four million more that might be able to answer for me [Hook]