Captain Ahab - I Don't Have A Dick lyrics

1:1 I am alive. I am a Man. 1:2 I am the oldest man alive. 1:3 I have been alive forever. 1:4 I sit atop My mountain stronghold and I look down at the other men at My feet and I laugh. I laugh at you. You, the Lesser Men, you, whose lives flicker by Me like a cloud of gnats 1:5 You are born and you die as I open and close My eyes to blink. 1:6 I watched as My slaves built for Me the Pyramids. I spoke the words as they were carved onto the Rosetta stone. I watched as Rome burned, as Pompeii was crushed and as the Twin Towers fell. 1:7 I have always been. And I will always be. You may see Me, though you will not know Me. You may see Me at the club, you may see Me on the street, you will be dazzled by My golden chains, by My spinning wheels, by My shining clothes. 1:8 I have the biggest Hat in the world. It's got a million diamonds hanging from its brim, it's been dyed the color that no painter has ever been able to mix, and it could shade all the starving children of the world at the same time. 1:9 I live in the biggest house in the world. It's the size of a hundred cities. I can sleep in a different room each night, and my bedspread is woven from the hairs of Queens. I drive the fastest car in the world, its seats are made from human skin. Its lights is brighter than a billion suns and its windshield is made out of diamonds and dreams. 1:10 And oh yeah, I make the loudest beats in the world, when my kick drum booms cities crumble and fall. So if you hear my music pumping you're gonna get f**ed up. 1:11 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. 1:12 I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick dick dick I don't dick I don't have. 1:13 I get the finest a** in the world that gets lined up just to smell my sweat. I can f** a hundred people at once 'cause I can make you come with my eyes. 1:14 I have the biggest gun in the world, it can shoot a hole right through the Sun. It's like a million atom bombs in my hand while I can shoot you in the head just for fun. 1:15 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. 1:16 I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick. 2:1 This song is not a metaphor. I do not mean this symbolically. I literally don't have a dick. This is my actual physical condition. I am missing the biological male reproductive organ. I do not have a vagina in its place, I am now and has always been male. I did not once have a dick and lose it by my choice or otherwise, nor will I ever have one. I am not feminized by this lack. Do not take this to mean that I lack for phallos in the psychoan*lytic sense, I am not powerless, I am not sterile. It is from overcompensation from my dicklessness that I have achieved authority and omnipotense. I am not great and powerful Because I don't have a dick. I am great and powerful And I don't have a dick. This does not make me anti-dick. I am not suggesting the removal of dicks and I do not advocate castration. This is merely an explanation of a coincidental fact. For Me, posessing or not posessing a dick affects absolutely nothing. I am simply revealing to You, the Listener, through the song my actual biological state. So now that We understand each other, sing with Me the Four Tenets of Our new Civization. 2:2 POWER. HONOR. AMBITION. FUTURE. 2:3 POWER, no dick. HONOR, no dick. AMBITION, no dick. FUTURE, no dick. 2:4 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. 2:5 I don't have a dick dick dick. I don't have a dick dick dick. I don't have a dick dick dick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick.