Buddy Wasisname And The Other Fellers - This Old Man/Twiggle Toes Hornpipe lyrics

Baby was the queen of darts I could really play pool She was a queen and I was thirty-two And we was still in the school (KEVIN) You weren't playing (WAYNE) Now Kevin He didn't like it b'y You're going to have to try again (KEVIN) No (KEVIN) Go on Johnny (WAYNE) Tis wasn't impressed (WAYNE) No sir (KEVIN) You want something totally different than that Do ya (WAYNE) Give her another one Give her another one Uncle Arnold's old bowels have moved once again Though he's still haven trouble pa**ing water He takes big pots of tea just to make him pee And his stomach ain't working like it oughta (KEVIN) How's that Ray? (RAY) It's worse (KEVIN) Worse (WAYNE) Try again Kevin (KEVIN) I know what he's after (WAYNE) Wha (KEVIN) Simple music Ordinary (WAYNE) Straight forward Bang Go (KEVIN) I I got her now Come on You just drive her once more Come on This old man He's got one Johnson motor on the bum Nick tells Pat "Give thing a wack This old this won't get us home" This old man He's got two His spare motor is Evinrude Nick says Pat "Give the cord a pull" And the motor joints just come unglued Well this old man haven't got three Clues about trouble mechanically Nick says Pat "He should get him sparked" "Don't go says Nick Can't see in the dark" This old man He got four He got two motors and he got two oars Nick says Peg "Get out your oar locks" But Nick finds out that they got them lost Well this old man He's got five Five old flares But near one lights Nick says Pat "Replace them when you should And you won't wind up with your flares no good" This old man He saved six Waterproof matches for when he's in the fix Nick says Pat "Strike up a light Tis not that bright in the middle of the night" Well this old man He had seven Inches of hose Where he needs eleven Nick says Pat "Here's what's wrong The hose is chopped All gas is gone" This old man He had eight Gallons of gas But it all escaped Nick says Pat "Here's what's wrong Your hose is chopped All your gas is gone" Well this old man Don't have nine Lives because he's not feline When Nick told Pat To strike up a light Nick and Pat was blown out of sight One old man He went ten Miles and landed home again But where is Pat He's on the other shore He won't get home With his Johnson outboard Two, three, four