I want to tell you all the story 'Bout the Harper Valley widow wife Who had a teenage daughter Who attended Harper Valley Junior High Well, her daughter came home one afternoon And didn't even stop to play She said, "Mama, I got a note here From the Harper Valley PTA" Well, the note said "Mrs. Johnson, you're a wearing your dresses way too high" It's reported you've been Drinking and a running round with men and goin' wild We don't believe you ought to be a Bringing up your little girl this way It was signed by the secretary Harper Valley PTA Well, it happened that the PTA Was gonna meet that very afternoon They were sure surprised when Mrs. Johnson wore her miniskirt into the room And then she walked up to the blackboard I still recall the words she had to say She said, "I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley PTA" Well, there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there And seven times he's asked me for a date And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use A lotta ice whenever he's away And Mr. Baker, can you tell us Why your secretary had to leave this town? And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep Her window shades all pulled completely down Well, Mr. Harper couldn't be here 'Cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath You'll find she's had a little nip of gin And then you have the nerve to tell me You think that as a mother I'm not fit Well, this is just a little Payton Place And you're all Harper Valley hypocrites No, I wouldn't put you on Because it really did it happened just this way The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA