Benny Troung - Tiger Birthday lyrics

Verse 1: Got drunk on a Monday (Monday?) Got drunk on a Tuesday (damn) Got drunk on a Wednesday Everyday booze-day Yo pa** me the shoestring, pa** me the belt Pa** me the scarf, pa** me the rope Pa** me the chair, I'm hangin' myself Happy birthday, let's party Might see your ex at the party Havin' s** in the potty With your best friend Johnny (Johnny?) He gon' exit the party He gon' wait in the lobby He gon' catch him some bodies Tryin' to escape to Hawaii That's not likely Pretend like it's gucci That's not wifey, good thin you kept jpegs of her coochie I got an idea f** her best friend Maria Tell a b**h watch her rear This couch from IKEA Chorus Verse 2: Osama Benny Laden No shirt, like Aladdin In the palace, I'm a stallion Squirtin' on Jasmine, pa** me a towel That was kinda retarded Beat kinda sound like "Slightly Retarded" BT, highly regarded Pardon me, while I shart on the carpet "Do you know who that is?" b**h see me, do a backflip Her elbow, autograph it Eyes up here, not on my package b**h got mad, had a tantrum Want attention, called me a has-been I'm a has-been Because I have been f**in her a** in abandoned buildings It's my birthday, that's what it is Let me get the baby-back ribs Bone a b**h in the back of the Siz Next thing you know, daddy got kids Left the state, don't you stalk me I'm unemployed, can't get sh** off me Changed my name, don't you call me Benny ain't goin' on Stephen Harvey Chorus Verse 3: Failed math, and biology Maybe I'll try scientology Marijuana, highest quality Saw your mom in line at Jollibee Hire me, wanna swallow me In the bathroom doin' gynecology What's those bumps? Don't lie to me (the f**?) Told me I might got the gonorrhee I ain't got no insurance b**h, I ain't even got a furnace If I ain't live in Los Urngales I woulda been got hypothermis (Brrrh) I think I might got diabeetus God damn I love these sweetuns God damn I live these Doritus I can't eat normal [???] Don't make no plans on Thursday Girl, you invited to my birthday (birthday) Bring me some bud, and some bird, mane Shave that puss, wake up early Bring your sister, Melisser How about you kiss her? Treat a ho like I treat my liver Thanks for the gift card Chorus Outro: Man: Wherever he goes, well placed sprays of urine announce his presence