[Intro] So this, this is a true story Not, Not a true story And all, all [?] fault [?] My DJ, DJ Meeks ( f**in' DJ Meeks ) Jose Juaqim, my tour manager It's their f**in' fault too (Jim the Cleaner) Motherf**ers ( Straight up ) [Verse 1] 5'9" in a skintight dress Standin' by the bar lookin' unimpressed Walked up, asked her how she liked the set Looked me up and down and she just said "Meh" Shock, shock, shock, shock Then I looked at her, said "You're not that hot" Of course that's what got her We f**ed all night and watched Harry Potter (Whoo!) Ironically, the p**y was magic Had a girl at home but I had to have it I flew her out to all of the markets June, July, and all of August 'Bout to cut her off right before I got caught up Then late one night at home she caught up Said that she was 'bout to have my kid Talkin' 'bout her period late, guess what I did? [Bridge] The phone on mute Ay Caramba Tried to regroup Ay Caramba Something, something, something Ay Caramba I don't give a f**, man Ay Caramba Ay Caramba What does this even mean? Ay Caramba (Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye) Ay Carumba Ay Carumba [Hook] This sh**'s so crazy This b**h 'bout to have my baby Hopin' she don't tell me lady 'Cause she already think I'm shady Knew she was trouble when I got her number f**ed her raw dog for the whole damn summer Can I keep both? That's what I wonder Oh my God, n***a, Ay Carumba [Verse 2] [?] secrets When she told me she was 'bout to name it and keep it It's our baby but it's her life So if she wanna keep it, then it's alright Now I'm knowin' there's no way to prevent My girlfriend throwin' me out on the cement It ain't the first time that she caught me creepin' But this time I done jumped off the deep end Ok, sh**, maybe this might fly Hopin' they'll try to be sisterwives Like my man Bill Paxton and Big Love Do a reality show and get big pub When ma find out, she gon' beat my a** 'Cause word get around in the street so fast I should've pulled out and put my dick in her mouth Now I got nine months to try and figure it out [Bridge] Ay Caramba Man.. Ay Caramba Oh, sh**.. Ay Caramba Where the f** I'm 'bout to live? Ay Caramba Oh God.. Ay Caramba She about to have a kid Ay Caramba Should've just.. Jose man! (Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye) Ay Caramba Ay Caramba [Hook] This sh**'s so crazy This b**h 'bout to have my baby Hopin' she don't tell me lady 'Cause she already think I'm shady Knew she was trouble when I got her number f**ed her raw dog for the whole damn summer Can I keep both? That's what I wonder Oh my God, n***a, Ay Carumba [Outro] (This the song you play when you know you f**ed up) (This the song you play when you know that your luck s**) (This the song you play when you know you f**ed up) (This the song you play when you know that your luck s**) (This the song you play when you know you f**ed up) (This the song you play when you know that your luck s**) Ay Caramba Ay Caramba Ay Caramba Ay Caramba Ay Caramba Ay Caramba (Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye) Ay Caramba Ay Caramba