Bebe Neuwirth - Where Did We Go Wrong? lyrics

Morticia (Spoken): She's perky Gomez (Spoken): She's bubbly Morticia (Spoken): She's optimistic Gomez(Spoken): Where did we go wrong? Morticia: We taught her to hunt Gomez: We taught her to aim Morticia: We gave her a bow Gomez: We gave her no shame Morticia: We gave what we had Gomez: Made sure she was bad Both: Did all that we could to keep her sad Gomez: We told her to stay away from modern jazz Morticia: We gaver her that week long trip to Alcatraz Gomez: We promised she'd be equipped Both: And filled her crypt with woe What'd we know? Gomez: We took her to funerals in the morning mist Morticia: We took her to slaughter houses Gomez: Schindler's list Morticia: We taught her to scowl and sneer and domineer Gomez: On cue Both: What did we do? Where did we go wrong? Gomez (Spoken): Are we good parents? Both: Where did we go wrong? Morticia (Spoken): Are we cliche? Both: Somewhere in between Guilt and guillotine We forgot to notice that our daughter lost her way Where did we go wrong? Morticia: And can we fix this? Gomez: Maybe it's a pa**ing phase Both: But if she's going wrong Then what will change her ways? Gomez (Spoken): That's it! We'll cancel this dinner Morticia (Spoken): We'll circle the wagon Gomez (Spoken): And give these "goody-licious" Beinekes the boot! Morticia: We must intervene Gomez: We shouldn't delay Morticia: She's barely eighteen Gomez: So what do we say? Morticia: We know the occult Gomez: That's certainly true Morticia: We're to consult Gomez: Morticia, with you Morticia: So why all the fuss? Gomez: My darling, discuss Morticia: She needs only us Gomez: It's us, only us Morticia: We've always been there for her To swear for her Gomez: Discourage dental care for her Both: Do well for her Excel for her Make home a living hell for her So where did we go wrong Is not the question Resolute and strong Is our next move Gomez: We'll tell her today Morticia: Do what we say Both: Send all the Beinekes back to the fray Turn them away at first sight And that's where we'll go right? Both(Spoken): No dinner tonight!