BeatsInMyBackPack - Memoir: Entry II/Memory Lane lyrics

[Verse 1] This is a memoir I think I'm on the second page And yesterday Took a trip down some memory lanes It's so insane I went to Hayes Can't keep a pace And man I'm just all over the place But I don't care My minds so scattered I'm just glad it hasn't shattered already Man what did they tell me Sticking to this music sh** is never gonna fail me And they helped me, picked me back up when I was feeling down I felt the blues Man I remember... Back against the wall, there was no one that I could call I heard it all I'll be there for you anytime You wasn't there for any time And every time I tried to take the knife into my chest... That's too much to confess I'm a mess But I been blessed with this rapping sh** Yeah, I guess This sh**s a test You gotta flex with your mind You stay forgetting the times Just take a trip down memory lane and hope the story's the same And if it ain't then oh well, they say everything change [Part II/Memory Lane] I took a trip down memory lane just today actually It was a nice experience I remember back when I was 17 and I would think "man, when I'm famous I definitely gotta mention this in my 'when I was 17' episode." I had made this song called "The Help" for my first album What actually motivated it was that I wanted to do this tour thing... My mom said no It destroyed me Like to the point that I just didn't want to make music anymore I was done And I remember this one time... I was so happy My mom had just gotten married Just moved into a new house And I mean an actual house It wasn't big but it was comfy I miss that place on Hayes Avenue Going to a new school It was nice And then... That night... I don't wanna get into much detail... But it lead to a divorce New city New school Ugh Back to happy thoughts I remember meeting my dad for the first time Well the first time that I would actually remember in life It was May 2011 I was in school and I got called down to the office Specifically it was my Algebra II cla** I knew I wasn't in trouble so naturally I was pretty confused I get to the office and I see my mom We get to talking and then this guy walks in My father It didn't take very long for him to be in tears looking at what I would a**ume was a mirror image of him at that age I didn't cry... At least while I was in the office I didn't know what to think I won't lie I was really happy about it though But I guess that's the reason I began to hurt so much once the broken promises followed We don't talk anymore... Maybe one day... One day when I can actually forgive him and mean it Ugh I need more happy thoughts I remember Halloween one year It was while my mom was still married We did a scavenger hunt in my basement It was all Ronnies idea Definitely my favorite Halloween ever I'll never forget it Back to 2011... My great grandmother died... So I made her a promise that I would never give up with her watching over me I'm keeping it Another important promise in my life My tenth birthday I promised that when I have kids I'll always be there for them, and be the father I never got to have myself There's that memoir