Bad Catholic Schoolgirls - The Masturbation Proclamation lyrics

AG = Awesome Gorgeous' lyrics ST = Special T's lyrics st: hey, how y'all doin' today special t here and i got somethin to say i'll get straight to the point - i love masturbation the hand solo is the dance that's taking the nation ag: by storm, had my hand on my co*k since birth the greatest pleasures on the face of the earth are not learned in the cla**room or found on the street everything i know i learned while poundin my meat st: damn right, and we don't leave anybody guessin we're comin straight with this one and you're wishin we kept our mouths shut ag: but its a serious matter nothin makes a heart pitter patter like stirrin the baby batter st: don't act like you're different, everybody's doin it i'm at my best when i'm strokin off and spewin it ag: half the time when i write these rhymes i got one hand on the pen and one on my divining rod chorus: everybody in the house (hell yea) y'all with me now? (hell yea) alright - now drop trou (hell yea) everybody whip ya sh** out everybody in the house (hell yea) y'all with me now? (hell yea) alright - now drop trou (hell yea) everybody whip ya sh** out st: here i go again on my own, me and my whitesnake playin with my meatwad but they call me master shake ag let's talk about feelings st my chili i'm peeling layin on my bed and stuccoing the ceiling ag it's so f**in hard these days to get any play if girls were potato chips, they'd be frito lay but once i pop i can't stop, can't have just one st i average like 10 times a day (sh** son) i beat off when i'm in bed, then again when i get up then in the shower, and again when i get on the bus and at the back of the cla**room, hand on my sack ag whackin off is more addicting than crack let me introduce you to my left and right hands the organ grinder and the pocket fisherman st my hands are always shakin, but i'm not nervous i'm not a gas station but i am self service (chorus) ag all i ever wanna do is get off today's special: i recommend the beef strokinoff special t - man what you up to tonight? st breakin out the oils, the candles, the barry white sorry man, i'm havin a party of one ag that's cool dude, sounds like a lotta fun to use the term literally "that's whack sh**" paper or plastic? st my waistband's elastic makes for easy access when i wanna jack it ag sometimes i prefer the sleeve of my jacket stand back kid st i'm about to explode for a little guy i pack a pretty big load ag DIY is what we all about st i dont give a f** i'll pull it out on your couch does everybody know what time it is? ag tool time! st oops, already dropped the jizz ag man you got the weirdest co*k i ever saw st but only because i been rubbin it raw (chorus)