Poor little old young girl Seventyfive years of age in mind Been that way since you were a little baby Girl you're surely one of a kind Puttin on fake liver spots with make up Drinkin tea, eatin bicuits, never gettin laid Drivin everyone around you crazy With your accordion and your hearing aid Accordion woman what you gonna do Talk like an old hag but you're only twentytwo Spend the afternoon talkin bout the old days Even though you were not around Can't you see you gonna get lonely When all your friends are in the ground Accordion woman what you gonna do Look like an old hag still you're only twentytwo Accordion woman Born fifty years too late Accordion woman Such a terrible fate Girl, you're only twentytwo