[Alec Baldwin & Ed Harris]
Oh, have I got your attention now?
Good cause we're adding to this month's sales contest
As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac El Dorado
Anybody wanna see second prize?
Second prize's a set of steak knives
Third prize is you're fired
You get the picture?
You laughing now?
You got leads
Mitch and Murray paid good money
Get their names to sell them
You can't close the leads you're given, you can't close sh**? You are sh**!
Hit the bricks, pal and beat it because you are going out!
The leads are weak
The leads are weak?
The f**in leads are weak?
You're weak
I've been in this business for 15 years
What's your name?
f** you, that's my name!
You know why, mister?
Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight
I drove an $80,000 BMW, that's my name
And your name is your wanting
You can't play in the man's game, you can't close them
You go home and tell your wife your troubles
Because only one thing counts in this life
Get them to sign on the line which is dotted
You hear me, you f**ing f*ggots?
[Verse 1: Andre, The Giant]
Shaquille O'neil
f** pigs, they squeal
Put a girl in some heels
Take her to an outlet
Got on a Thrasher outfit
Put in work. export
Make her legs soar
You let that dumb a** keg pore
Well, that's nice
Look at my wife, look at yourself, then look at my life
You s**a
Married to a MILF, motherf**er
I trust her
Refuse to wear rubbers
You like 'em plastic
That's tragic
On that Illmatic
On that Imagine
Hendrix with the flames
Einstein with the brains
Pimp with no cane
You got no dreams
No team
Candles like I'm satanic
All I want is marriage and I'm a romantic
Not here to do damage
Yet you end up in a bandage
Bandanna Bandit
The beat slammin'
Dreams bigger than that banana hammock
I'm the man kid, you a man child
Check the mic, then check my style
[Monologue: Andre, The Giant]
Yeah
Acoustic guitar on my back as I walk through the desert in the shadow of the valley of d**h
That was from the bible
That bible is called my text messages
Haha
Yeah, they screenshot that sh** and put it in a book and called it the new new testament
We on that new new sh**
Got that new new b**h
Look at the ring, we just got married
[Verse 2: 666999]
Kilo after kilo, week after week
Gucci on my waist while your girl on my dick
I'd let the girl drive, but you know it's a stick
Walk into the room and the a**es look thick
Girls come to me, I don't need to pick
bu*ter up them biscuits, call that Bisquick
Grills in my mouth, no need for a toothpick
Need quick cash, it's gonna be ruthless
Head so good, that she was toothless
When gettin' money, you're a student
My game is fluent
Move keys I might just do it
Weed, I bet you grew it
You losin' motherf**er
s** my dick, s**a
[Verse 3: Andre, The Giant & 666999]
Barangadang
Let my dick hang
Let that sh** bang
sh**stain
I ball like Larry Bird
You know my lines absurd
I love clothes, but I also love women naked
Shouts to Mason
You know that's Mason Winslow
s** on my toes
Andre chillin'
Andre in the buildin'
Back of a limo with my children
I like to smell little children, Steve Buscemi
You who*es laughin'
Rap game Larry Davis, curb your orgasm
Aaron Hamilton-Grenham puckers his lips while his b**h puckers her a**
Kiss my a**
Two white guys with nice hair ballin' like two clones of Steve Nash
Oh hey there, b**h
sh** on my chest
DJ sh*tONMYFACE, WE THE BEST
Oh hahaha
KKK
Nein, nein, nein
Kiss a baby
Six, six, six
That b**h, that b**h, and that other b**h
On my dick, my other dick
Okay, I have three dicks
I am Michael Cera
Praise DJ Khaled