[Intro]
(*clears throat*)
Yo, let me tell you something
[Verse 1: Tribe One]
Now, this is not another one that got away song
This is about the one I made a huge mistake on
I'm gonna tell you some things that'll make ya face palm
And you'll be glad to know I left and then I stayed gone
Before it all went way wrong it seemed great
We met each other with no strings and a clean slate
Everything to make a new relationship begin to blossom
We had so many things in common, it was awesome
She was all that I could think of for a solid week
Every night, talking on the phone until we'd fall asleep
And then we'd wake up and everyday was chat and text
That's why it caught me off guard with what happened next
I guess I just expected too much from her
Cause she seemed to hit
All of the keywords in my custom search
And as we grew as lovers
I would soon discover
I'd regret we ever met
And wish we never knew each other
[Hook/Sample]
Why can't we be friends? X 4
[Verse 2: Tribe One]
Have you ever thought
You really got to know a person?
And then you learned
That you were being shown a phony version?
If that makes me shallow, she was off the deep end
And these are the reasons we could never be friends:
She likes Star Wars
I like Star Trek
She obviously watched it but thought that it was far-fetched
And I haven't even said the worst part yet
That she preferred Kirk when clearly Picard's best
My aching heart made it hard to stay impartial
When she said she loved D.C. and hated Marvel
And there was nothing more sure to make us argue
Then when we tried to sit and pick a favorite cartoon
She told me she would like me better as a Brony
But if she don't like Adventure Time she'll never really know me
And nothing was worse than getting my feelings hurt
Agreeing on Ghostbusters but not on who the real ones were
And that slap in the face left a bad after taste
Cause I'm a Mac and she was P.C. master race
Among her other numerous regrettable habits
She tried to tell me Yu-Gi-Oh was better than Magic
You know that she preferred the wrong doctor?
And she inferred that she was certain Han shot first?
And even after that
I thought that we could still be friends though
But then she said that Genesis was better than Nintendo?
Aw, hell no
[Hook/Sample]
Why can't we be friends? X 8
[Verse 3: Tribe One]
Now there are times when you're forced to choose sides
And that choice will determine the course of two lives
When divides are too wide, it's easy to lose sight
And it all becomes about who's wrong and who's right
But there's no point in starting new fights
You just move on to someone who wants what you like
Every new dawn starts with moonlight
And some diamonds don't last forever
But me and her are never getting back together
Never ever, Never ever
Never eh- Never ever? Never ever?!
Yeah, no. exactly
Never. not ever
[Hook/Sample]
Why can't we be friends? X 8