My whole entire life I've felt a little out of place
How I thought about the universe and what was in my brain
Bout this miracle of consciousness and why we're all alive
Trying hard to understand why I am terrified to die
It's cuz I don't believe in Heaven, but I do believe in Hell
And I know there is a devil cuz I know him pretty well
We play poker every Saturday, he figured out my tell
It is a guilt that he can all but taste and smell
It is my bottomless well
And I must face it every day
It's always ever so inviting
My strength of will is not too great
I party way too hard, I stay up late
And these ghosts that haunt my bedside
Disappear when the moon goes down
And I'd rather hide than try to fight them
But this cycle makes them stronger
It's too late for me
But it is not too late for you
So listen close, and you might just save us both
And maybe learn a thing or two
Cus I've seen the end
Boy, it's sad, but oh so beautiful
Still, don't take me there again
I don't want to go back
Why don't you sit with me?
And we can talk about anything you want to
Maybe we can figure out the world
And make it leave us alone
I changed on the 2nd of May, 2009
But I pretended I was doing just fine
The part that hurt the worst of all
I never did anything wrong at all
Defining an archetype, becoming a man
Living in a broken down card house
Running, laughing, shouting, singing
Screaming "someone stop the bleeding"
Crying "this is it, this is the end"
This is the end
Chorus
I readily admit I've got a bit of ADD
And my lyrics probably don't make sense to anyone but me
So while I'm on a roll of temporary clarity
I'll try my hardest to enunciate exactly what I mean
I want nothing more in life except to happily settle down
But I've been hurt too many times, and my times are running out
So I drink away the anguish but that only makes it worse
This cycle is a curse, this cycle is a curse
And so I sing of it every single day
There's nothing left to do
With a life f**ing perfect, no one can relate to you
One day I'll self destruct, break all that's there to lose
I am a ticking time bomb, looking for a fuse
The people that I've wronged
The ones I've left behind
The kids that had my back
Now, neurons in my mind
Will we be okay?
Will we ever speak again?
Do I know what it all means?
It matters not, for I still fear
While fulgor has now pa**ed, blown through thousand blades of gra**
The shadows shall remain, though all of us have changed
Fond memories of past are now but phantoms on a stage
Sweet dreams have come and gone with nightmares on their backs
My whole entire life I've felt a little out of place
I was told I was a horse, that I was loyal and brave
Then a demon on my shoulder told me "Stephen, you're a snake"
And I knew that it was true, yeah I knew it right away
On the bright side maybe broken bones will find a way to heal
And I'll have bada** scars and stitches to remind me it was real
And that the meanings in the little things and that should be enough
Yeah, the meanings in the little things, I think...
I think that it's enough
But if heaven is real, and if I'm permitted to go
Will you be waiting with a smile and open arms?
Please be waiting with a smile and open arms
Waiting with a smile and open arms