[Verse 1: Loud Mouth]
Bring my gingerbread don't forget the Xanax
I need an early dismissal slip from planned preg
She wanna keep it she's tweakin' that's what her dad said
Now her dad's dead I smashed his skull in with a black sled
That said, let's leave the grieving in the past tense
Feeling like Ebenezer Scrooge face got mad dents
It's all good though
That's just my character
This Christmas all I really wanna do is stare at your girl
Motherf**ers throwing shade from the shade
I'm on stage rocking out
Getting paid b**h I'm made
And whatchu doing?
Nothing, flexing, fronting, hating on a brother
That sh** is in and out the other ear
Oh my mother dear
[Verse 2: Will is Chillin]
Here comes Frosty freeze
Here comes Frosty freeze
Giving you all of these bars
Stocking's full of coal so she leave the stockings on
Met me at the mistletoe
I egged her on
She give me noggin, eggnog, and pearly whites
It's such an early night
I interrupted Jesus and Santa tag team
Cage match against Pope Francis and Krampus
Slammed Santa into a table
Sneak attack from a dreidel spinning golem made of Play-doh
[Verse 3: Rebel Legato]
Yo
I got trees for the festivities
Eggnog and bongs just for the family
Let's lift the spot with good weed and lyrical felonies
This TCG
I'm Papi sí come on hang with me
Three blunts rolled blunt as can be
Mami ven aquí
I keep the peace but my presence peace-keep
Blessed you with a sentence like a n***a just sneezed
Believe me
I slay beats with ease and cripple fiends
[Verse 4: Bruce Bayne]
Happy Birthday baby Jesus
People say your name after our wordplay, genius
Ebenezer season
Never needs a reason
Have a J. Cole CD
In your stocking and Adidas Yeezus
My presence so big it's orbiting ornaments in four minutes flat
She on Santa's lap like I hope there's more in the bag
It gets better but this sh** ugly like Christmas sweaters
Intercept your gifts and letters
Gives a sh** but it's whatever
It's the N-O to the E-L
At the holiday party like f** my boss and retail
We elves
Chain tinier than Tiny Tim times ten
Tryna win white elephant gifts from the wise men
[Verse 4: Acumental]
I'm a hundred-yard Dasher
Dancer in the Dark like
"I've Seen It All"
Prancercising at the park
I'm finna holler at a Vixen
Living on a Comet
Lovesick like Cupid with a laudanum addiction, uh
Bill Murray, Dick Donner, Chuck Dickens
You apathetic kids are getting tackled on the Blitz
And I'm awfully rude
Off on a paper chase
We haul the sleigh
Call that sh** reindeer games
[Verse 5: Terminal Knowledge]
Smoke dank piff but
Who got the molly and the rolls to keep me jollier than old Saint Nick?
Basically that's how it goes
I got a stocking full of coal for you basic a** ho-ho-hoes
I know I ain't sh**
But I spit like somebody who might be
And I could give a f** if you don't like me
So get up off the naughty or nice
This is a hit list and if you on it it'll cost you your life
[Various shoutouts to baby Jesus]