There's an old shack Near a dirt-track Where aging rock stars go And reminisce Then take a piss And sing kinda slow There's a taverna With a bunsen burner Where they cook their beans And remember The old West and how things used to be... singing California and bat guano And beating up the new kid in town And eating beans in some hacienda And taking your trousers down And desperadoes and bat guano And making out with Jesse James And eating dogs and k**ing Injuns 'Caues they had dumb names And mountain pa**es And sore a**es And going outside for a leak And getting shot at In the john and Not washing for a week But now the dirt-track's
Full of cadillacs It's a freeway in a smokeless zone And the taverna's a McDonald's And my friends are answer-phones And there's a country Up a gumtree Called the U S of A And there's an a**hole In the White House And we long for those bygone days... of California and bat guano And sleeping with your horse And k**ing dogs and eating Injuns And being an a**hole of course Desperadoes and bat guano And singing harmony-y-y-y-y-y-y I'm just a cowboy with a guitar Oh what's to become of me California and bat guano Got the better of me I'm a desperado 'Cos there's bat guano All over me Dead cicada