[Verse 1]
I'd commit a number of any crimes
If I could get a thousand lashes from your eyes
It's a puerile compliment
I'm a senile delinquent
Whose day in court never comes
[Chorus]
Whose way to court girls is all thumbs
Whose day in court never comes
Whose way to court he just hums
[Verse 2]
Who is city and who is horses
Who writes the words and who sings the choruses
I'm fishing for a complement
I'm in prison on arraignment
For a crime I didn't commit
[Bridge]
This time I'm innocent
I swear that I'm not fit
To take the stand and admit
This time I'm innocent