Who's the television host
Understands what matters most?
Stephen, Stephen
He's a handsome man
His name is Stephen
Whoa-oh, number one TV show
Oh, Stephen, Stephen
He's a dashing man
His name is Stephen
Whoa-oh, he's taking on the status quo
Don't stop believin'
Stephen, Stephen
Don't stop transceivin'
Stephen, Stephen
He's calling out the bears
In their evil lairs
He's calling out the press
In their fancy dress
Who's the television host
Understands what matters most
Don't stop believin'
Stephen, Stephen
Don't stop transceivin'
Stephen, Stephen
He's calling out the bears
In their evil lairs
He's calling out the press
In their fancy dress
He's calling out the Decemberists
And their green-screen contests
Stephen, Stephen
He's a handsome man
His name is Stephen
Oh, Stephen, Stephen
He's a dashing man
His name is Stephen