as i was going to derby 'twas on a market day
i met the finest ram sirs that ever was fed upon hay (chorus)
that's a lie that's a lie
that's a lie a lie a lie!!! this ram and i got drunk sir as drunk as drunk could
be
and when we sobered up sir we were far away out
on the sea (chorus) this wonderful old ram sir was playful as a kid;
he swallowed the captain's spygla** along with the
bo'sun's fid (chorus) one morning on the poop sir afore eight bells was
struck
he climbed up to the sky's i yard an' sat down on the truck (chorus) this wonderful ol' ram sir he tried a silly trick
he tried to jump a five-barred fence and landed in a
rick (chorus) this wonderful ol' ram sir it grew two horns of bra**
one grew out o' his shoulder blade t'other turned into
a mast (chorus) an' when this ram was k**ed sir the butcher was
covered in blood
five and twenty butcher boys was carried away the
flood (chorus) an' when this ram was dead sir they buried it in st
joan's
it took ten men an' an elephant to carry one of its
bones (chorus)