here among them -- the americans -- this baffling
multi people -- extremes and variegations -- their
noise -- restlessness -- their almost frightening
energy -- how best describe these aliens in my
reports to The Counselors
disguise myself in order to study them unobserved
adapting their varied pigmentations -- white black
red brown yellow -- the imprecise and strangering
distinctions by which they live -- by which they
justify their cruelties to one another
charming savages -- enlightened primitives -- brash
new comers lately sprung up in our galaxy -- how
describe them -- do they indeed know what or who
they are -- do not seem to -- yet no other beings
in the universe make more extravagant claims
for their importance and identity
like us they have created a veritable populace
of machines that serve and soothe and pamper
and entertain -- we have seen their flags and
foot prints on the moon -- also the intricate
rubbish left behind -- a wastefully ingenious
people -- many it appears worship the Unknowable
Essence -- the same for them as for us -- but are
more faithful to their machine made gods
technologists their shamans
oceans deserts mountains grain fields canyons
forests -- variousness of landscapes weathers
sun light moon light as at home -- much here is
beautiful -- dream like vistas reminding me of
home -- item -- have seen the rock place known
as garden of the gods and sacred to the first
indigenes -- red monoliths of home -- despite
the tensions i breath in i am attracted to
the vigorous americans -- disturbing sensuous
appeal of so many -- never to be admitted
something they call the american dream -- sure
we still believe in it i guess -- an earth man
in the tavern said -- irregardless of the some
times night mare facts we always try to double
talk our way around -- and its okay the dreams
okay and means whats good could be a damn sight
better -- means every body in the good old u s a
should have the chance to get ahead or at least
should have three squares a day -- as for myself
i do okay not -- crying hunger with a loaf of
bread tucked under my arm you understand i
fear one does not clearly follow i replied
notice you got a funny accent pal -- like where
you from he asked -- far from here i mumbled
he stared hard -- i left
must be more careful -- item -- learn to use okay
their pa** word okay
crowds gathering in the streets today for some
reason obscure to me -- noise and violent motion
repulsive physical contact -- sentinels pigs
i heard them called with flailing clubs -- rage
and bleeding and frenzy and screaming -- machines
wailing -- unbearable decibels -- i fled lest
vibrations of the brutal scene do further harm
to my metabolism already over taxed
The Counselors would never permit such barbarous
confusion -- they know what is best for our sereni
ty -- we are an ancient race and have outgrown
illusions cherished here -- item -- their vaunted
liberty -- no body pushes me around i have heard
them say -- land of the free they sing -- what do
they fear mistrust betray more than the freedom
they boast of in their ignorant pride -- have seen
the squalid ghettoes in their violent cities
paradox on paradox -- how have the americans
managed to survive
parades fireworks displays video spectacles
much grandiloquence much buying and selling
they are celebrating their history -- earth men
in antique uniforms play at the carnage whereby
the americans achieved identity -- we too recall
that struggle as enterprise of suffering and
faith uniquely theirs -- blonde miss teen age
america waving from a red white and blue flower
float as the goddess of liberty -- a divided
people seeking rea**urance from a past few under
stand and many scorn -- why should we sanction
old hypocrisies -- thus dissenters -- The Counse
lors would silence them
a decadent people The Counselors believe -- i
do not find them decadent -- a refutation not
permitted me -- but for all their knowledge
power and inventiveness not yet more than raw
crude neophytes like earthlings everywhere
though i have easily pa**ed for an american -- in
bankers grey afro and dashiki long hair and jeans
hard hat yarmulka mini skirt -- describe in some
detail for the amusement of The Counselors -- and
though my sk** in mimicry is impeccable -- as
indeed The Counselors are aware -- some thing
eludes me -- some constant amid the variables
defies an*lysis and imitation -- will i be judged
incompetent
america -- as much a problem in metaphysics as
it is a nation earthly entity an iota in our
galaxy -- an organism that changes even as i
examine it -- fact and fantasy never twice the
same -- so many variables
exert greater caution -- twice have aroused
suspicion -- returned to the ship until rumors
of humanoids from outer space -- so their scoff
ing media voices termed us -- had been laughed
away -- my crew and i laughed too of course
confess i am curiously drawn -- unmentionable -- to
the americans -- doubt i could exist among them for
long however -- psychic demands far too severe --
much violence -- much that repels -- i am attracted
none the less their variousness their ingenuity
their elan vital -- and that some thing -- essence
quiddity -- i cannot penetrate or name