[INTRO, jazzy music playing in the background] Mhmmm Hello there Whats your name? Sadie, you say? What a lovely name Yeah, the same name as my grandfather, yeah [Professor Elemental] You remind me of a car Because you're nice and shiny You remind me of my own bottom Always right behind me You remind me of a very detailed painting I really like to look at you I'm the policeman of love, baby And I'm about to throw the book at you (look at you) Looking at me Looking back at you - what do you see? Well, me - obviously That's been established I'm all on you, like orange on a carrot Those beautiful eyes, yes they're mine I'll play traffic warden and you're in for a hefty fine Parked on my heart but there's double yellow lines You'll find on my spleen there's a no-parking sign Ooh girl... Ooh girl.... You make me want to do things...
Special things... Things that no man has ever done with a woman... Because she wouldn't let him Mhmm... You've got a lovely set of goggles And yes that is a euphemism You're eyes as pretty as a pony Your hair is softer than a gibbon Lovelier than spring in Ipswich You smell as nice as fresh stationery And if I ever went to prison for something relatively minor Would you wait for me? (wait for me?) Would you ever date with me? Share a little cake with me? At the risk of being forward basically would you mate with me? Yeah, sorry that is a bit full on but I'm into you like an undersized thong I like you like kids like mittens like cats like kittens like rappers like spitting Without you I'd flail like a whale out of water and baby please lift that restraining order Ooh girl... Ooh girl... [OUTRO - NONSENSE]