These pain pills are depressing Said she sent a text, I guess I never got the message Hard headed, all the stress keeps my heart arrested Will you still love me even if I never learn my lesson These are my confessions based off my broken blessings Running from affection back to my money making methods My obsession with the streets fuels my aggression Burden by my past left with so many questions Life is a crash course such a hard road Wore my heart on my sleeve now my arms broke Still the scars show broken by my misery Xanax bar please erase me from my memories I've been trapt inside my mind like I'm doing time I see darkness very seldom see the sun shine These feelings that I'm feeling I swear to god don't nobody know Heart broken and I'll be damned if I let it show The pain increases as the pills tear apart my soul No second guessing, do me a favor and let me let you go A lot of people say they love me but I'm all alone Consequences from my actions now my mind gone It's so hard to carry on when your on your own Now I'm spending nights praying that I make it home Conversations on the phone and missed calls Baby mama slammed the door and told me get lost She still holds a grudge, I guess I can't escape the past Get involved with different women but they never last
Now I never laugh, lord be my witness Karma caught me before I ever found forgiveness This sh** is crazy, it's repetitive it happens daily Once a good man now I'm the way that y'all made me Steady turning pages in search of a different chapter Welcome to the aftermath of my disaster My mind is racing faster for the finer things But lately I don't give a f** about a damn thing Gone insane coz my life ain't a f**in game Try to take what I love and you gon meet the flame Motherf**er I ain't playin on no fake sh** Runnin out of time and I done lost my patience Every day is a test, livin ain't that easy My drug habits out of hand and it keeps increasing Now I'm having long conversations with my heart Apologizing coz I let a b**h tear it apart Surrounded by the marijuana smoke in my cigar Sitting all alone, now I'm back at the start Searching for some closure but it seems my soul is scared Now as I grow older I see love is a facade With the world on my shoulders feeling I'm in the dark Shattered my ambitions out here barred I gotta pray to god that I make it through the evening The heat I gotta keep incase my enemies get even I gotta stay alive for my child, that's my reason This is what I hide inside and these are my feelings