I can't take much more
With all to hide, I don this guise, and
Smile and I mask it all
That smile hides a wretched man plotting self-demise
I scream at the sky as the floodgates burst
I went from ignored to the scum of the Earth
My head is in another place
Hoping for some lucky ace
To lift away the hurt
You f**ing hate me, don't you? Well
I hate me more, 'cuz
When I fumble at each open door
A slew of trapdoors just conjure up, with the enticing lure of a
Better life
God, and I keep f**ing falling for it!
Snap me out of this!
I feel a paradigm shift
And the voices amplify
When the shift creates a quake
I used to a**imilate and now I'm
Ostracized and laughed at
I looked beyond this pit;
Saw my ambition wither, die, and rot
I'm burning every bridge that I've ever built
With a blade in my fever dream fantasy, I give
I'm a cyst, and I'm only here just to prove my worth
Even though I'm not worth a thing, I just want to feel
SAFE
Am I losing my mind?
'Cuz every turn, there's more
Fuel for these thoughts
To fester and take on life
I can't take this anymore!
WHY?!