You wouldn't believe all the things I've done
I've been around the world
I've talked to everyone
And I've shook everyone's hand
And I even k**ed a man with my gun
You wouldn't believe all the things I've done (Chorus)
'Cause I've jumped out of planes
I've took the lord's name in vain
Heaven help me there ain't no end in sight
I think I'm going insane
There's no one out there for me to relate this life to
oh ohh oh
oh ohh oh You wouldn't believe all the things I've done
I've hung out with celebrities in the past
And I've been buzzed, I've been high, I've been drunk
I've made myself look like an a**
And all of these things we do for fun
You wouldn't believe all the things I've done (Chorus) You wouldn't believe all the things I've done
I hiked down the side of the Grand Canyon
I stripped down naked and I jumped in the ocean
And I deployed for three long years
And woah but I drank so much beer
You wouldn't believe all the things I've done (Chorus) You wouldn't believe all the things I've done
Like how I married my best friend
But I've had to bury so many men
I see their faces when I walk through Arlington
And at night when I close my eyes
Their voices and screams are my lullabies We've jumped out of planes
We've took the Lord's name in vain
Heaven help us there ain't no end in sight
I think we're going insane
And there's no one out there for us to relate our lives to
oh ohh oh
oh ohh oh
oh ohh oh
oh ohh oh