If I could get even with steven
I'd sacrifice many other day
To tell all the people who worship his name
All the tales of his merciless ways
It's sad not a soul would believe them
So think as the web that he spun
But I know the truth of his terrible tales
And maybe the truth will save one
Oh steven, you're not a man
You're not even a boy
You're just one cheating, apple eating heathen
The truth will bring me joy, oh joy, oh joy
If I could get even with steven
I'd have 2 stoops of very low
A swift uppercut wouldn't cut it
I feel so below, yeah on top we must go
I give you a reason for leaving
And tell your insetatious clan
To quit the charades and for once just behave
As the heavenly father commence
Oh steven, you're not a man
You're not even a boy
You're just one cheating, apple eating heathen
The truth will bring me joy, oh joy, oh joy
But I can't get even with steven
I pray dear saint peter to spare
Now one feels the detail of your wretched ways
When you judge for you many affairs
Cause I cringe when I think that you're thievin
Some poor helpless heart as I speak
But the handsome gets ba*tards
Are all in god's grace
Till the craziest wake from their sleep
Oh steven, you're not a man
You're not even a boy
You're just one cheating, apple eating heathen
The truth will bring me joy, oh joy, oh joy