Dammit it feels good to be a chap
A proper chap knows exactly where it's at
A proper chap is a rogue
In well-heeled brogues
Who knows exactly when it's right to wear a hat
He wears it outdoors, takes it off when he gets in
And never matches pocket square and tie
A proper chap drinks tea or a lovely drop of gin
A proper chap knows exactly why
And everything is splendid in the mind of a chap
Because a chap's mind is on higher things
A proper chap quotes Byron
With a collar and a tie on
And proper chap will doff a cap and ting
So to all of you want-to-be, tight shiny suit from Mr Byrite-wearing prats
Here's the news: watch your P and Qs
Because dammit it feels good to be a chap
Dammit it feels good to be a chap
Treating ladies with politeness and respect
Because the ladies they know - they don't want another bro
They want a gentleman in Prince of Wales check
Dammit it feels good to be a chap
A proper chap is what this nation needs
Riding round town on my black penny-farthing
Looking charming in my cycle-clips and tweed
Now chaps they may come in all shapes and colors
We're inclusive and we're rather friendly coves
So drop your pantaloon de Nîmes--
No, that's not what I mean!
I mean buy some proper strides and head for Hove
So to all of you low-slung, skinny-jean, lumberjack beard and wooly beanie-hat twats
Everybody in Surrey looks just like you
But dammit it feels good to be a chap