Well, my baby's liquored up and she's talkin' to my friends
About this, that, and nothin', then starts it all again
Head like a powder keg, lips set on fire
She's lookin' for a s**er, she found another buyer
Stink-breath, sudden d**h, Satan at the bar
Grabbin' every bu*t no matter who you are
Even the cops think she's gone too far
She just took a dump in my new car!
She's all liquored up (my baby's drunk as skunk!)
She's all liquored up (hey, goddangit, don't throw up!)
She's all liquored up
Well, she smiles like a reptile, her lips are razor-thin
Her legs are made of jello, her voice'll rip your skin
To hide her potty mouth she hikes her skirt above her head
The whole Seventh Fleet's checkin' out her spread
Foul gas, shot gla** stuck to her snout
In everybody's business, she don't care what it's about
Rum, gin, anything, now it's Guinness Stout
The whole club's prayin' she finally pa**es out
She's all liquored up (oh, she's normally a nice girl)
She's all liquored up (look at her go!)
She's all liquored up
(I'm gonna attack the guitar!)
Stink-breath, sudden d**h, Satan at the bar
In everybody's business, she don't care who you are
Even the cops think she's gone too far
She just took a dump in my new car!
She's all liquored up (my baby's all liquored up)
She's all liquored up (would you please get of the floor, dammit!)
She's all liquored up (hey, hey, quit unzippin' my pants!)
She's all liquored up (oh yeah, I said stop that now)
She's all liquored up
(Yeah, normally a nice girl, geez)