The other day I had a little problem
I found another Taxman at my door
Hey you know the kind of feeling this arouses
So I done what I've done many times before
I asked him very nicely if he'd like to step this way
And have a cup of coffee and a bun
Then I hit him with a shovel
And I stuffed him in the cupboard
With the coal sacks and I turned about and sung
Oh what shall I do with the Taxman in the cupboard
Mother Hubbard had a look but it were bare
But I've got thirty-one and another one just come
D'yer think it's something that I should declare
I'm not raving I'm just saving
On my income tax I'm waiving
Regulations that would quickly strip me bare
So what shall I do with the Taxmen in the cupboard
What shall I do with them there
The other day I went down t' post office
And I said "I know it's really not the norm
But I've got a load of bodies I want shifting
I wonder if you've got the proper form?"
They said "we're very sorry but we'll have to disappoint
We just can't undertake that kind of thing
I think they thought that I were barmy
They said "The Salvation Army may be the people that you ought to ring"
So what shall I do with the Taxmen in the cupboard
I've asked them but they only sit and stare
Now I've got thirty two, with another turning blue
Since I stuck a little poker though his hair
I'm not raving I'm just saving
On my income tax I'm waiving
Regulations that would quickly strip me bare
So what shall I do with the Taxmen in the cupboard
What shall I do with them there