[Verse 1: Mads]
I'm a tortured soul, I'm just so low
I got a bogus smile, I'm not normal
I don't find the time, I feel sorrow
Easy for yah to judge, but yah just don't
Know the real deal, what I'm saying
I'm depressed for real, I ain't playing
I'm a deep guest, I'm just waiting
To check out from this black cloud that I'm staying on
All I ever wanted was to play along strong
Never thought that I was suicidal, sh** wrong
I still remember that day, I was so close, a click from gone, I've been sick so long
Oh, I'm not making this up, to fill a song
I'm not making hip hop for you to sing along
This is real pain, real feelings
Real words, I'm hurt and f** it I'll sing it
[Hook: Karoline]
Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world
(Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin')
All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world
(Cause everything they do is too good to be true)
[Verse 2: Mads]
Waking up to another f**ing day
Police call me say they got something to say
They think my mom is dead, from overdose so they
Need my approval to break in, ok
As I'm sitting there waiting on the message
I'm preparing myself on how I'm gon' tell it
To my brother, my grandpa, my cousin, and grandma
I share a deep depression, this direction is hell
I never thought I'd had to be the man in this family
Yesterday I was 10, now it's no remedy
I've been threatening and beating, sweating and bleeding
To prevent the darkness from impeding my feelings
I'm at the point where I'm more than low
I got dangerous plans that no one knows
Every day is a battle inside, my thoughts they grow
First k** them all, then give myself the last bullet whole
[Hook: Karoline]
Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world
(Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin')
All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world
(Cause everything they do is too good to be true)
[Verse 3: Mads]
Keep pouring evil liquid in my cup
I'm not drinking, watch it float over the top
Take my life away, I don't give a f**
I'm at the edge, singing my last song
Ain't planning on stop
And guess what, I give up, so what now? I go down
One click, and I'll be just another body in the water, floating around
And that sounds so peaceful
My brain, there is nothing more lethal
I got pain, no one can see through
Everyday demons tryna defeat you
And to top it all off
There's no one that calls
And even if there was
They couldn't help me from those thoughts
So I'm thinking about leaving, exit from this overload
Forever peace and
Just sail away like a swan
Every day that I live, is a day that I won
But I don't think that I'm gone
I make it to the next morning, no warning, be gone by the end of dawn
And as I'm looking through my eyes, at my last minute
I'm thinking of my life, my past and what I had in it
My bad but I'm about to quit it, sh**
Tell people I was tired of, this
[Hook: Karoline]
Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world
(Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin')
All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world
(Cause everything they do is too good to be true)