[All]
We're the cousins, who ruled over dozens
King George, Tsar Nick and Kaiser Billy
When the century started, we could hardly be parted
But that was long before, the frightful First World War
[king George]
I'm King George and when young I forged an alliance with these two
Through Queen Vic we were related, together world power she created
[Tsar Nicholas]
I'm Tsar Nicholas with George mischievous, swapped uniforms at posh dos
We looked like twin set, had matching beards
Right royal family, if a little weird
[King George]
Drove advisors round the bend,
[George and Nicholas]
so all that friendship had to end.
[All]
We're relations, crowned by our nations
Great Britain, Russia and Germany
When our governments fell out, peaceful relations put in doubt
Conditions perfect for, the frightful First World War
[Kaiser Wilhelm]
I'm Kaiser Wilhelm, I kind of felt a bit left out from the rest
They had beards, I only had a moustache
Feared my withered arm gave me less panache
I loved the military, thought at diplomacy, I would be the best
[All]
We sent telegrams, hoped to stop the bombs
They weren't worth the paper they were written on
[Kaiser Wilhelm]
I called England mad March hares
[king George]
You didn't help avert war there
Now all leaders that all succeed us
Great Britain, Russia, both against me
[Kaiser Wilhelm]
I was in charge of German troops
[George and Nicholas]
But you proved to be hopeless, oops
[Kaiser Wilhelm]
The commanders they ignored, in the frightful First World War
[king George]
My family ties embarra**ing, our kinship now a ha**le
I changed my German surname to Windsor like the castle
Then Russian Revolution came Nick said "Help me mate!"
I couldn't support him, had to leave him to his fate
[Tsar Nicholas]
Execution! oh
[All]
And then the war, was no more
[King George] We won, [Kaiser Wilhelm] we lost, [Tsar Nicholas] call it a score draw
[King George]
I was the only one left in charge
[kaiser Wilhelm]
I ran away but still at large
[All]
And all this frightful war could do, was set up World War Two
[George and Nicholas]
Which was us against you
[All]
Boo boo be doo!