[Round 1: Pat Stay]
This here is my last battle, so pay close attention
All battle rappers are f*ggots and there ain't no exceptions
I love my fans but y'all rappers can s** a dick, I ain't playing around
I wish I could chuck a grenade in the crowd and k** all you f**ing f*ggots right now
I ain't laughing
s**ers is lame I hate rappers
He tucked in his chain cause I'm f**ing insane, I'd straight jack it/jacket
He likes wordplay so I'll let the nerd play Scrabble and strangle his burnt face ba*tard
Til he spells my first name backwards
Now I didn't wanna get personal with you cause this ain't even a personal issue
It's a nerd with a pencil against a Serbian pistol with aim sharp as a curve on a Ginsu
Sounds like a surfacing missile searching to hit you
When all you heard was a whistle
His father died and since I'm the guy who did the homicide I'll murder his kid too
Now before he accepted this battle I had to promise I wouldn't diss his pops
But I still might do it just to piss him off
And if he steps up in my face he's getting dropped
He'll cry louder than Psycho finding guys trousers by his wife's shower
That were owned by Dwight Howard with a note that says "Size matters"
I've lost my mind
Can't even stop it with anti-psychotics the doc prescribes
I've shared a therapist with Arabic terrorists and Eric Harris from Columbine
f** a charity for autism, I'll stomp a retarded guy and rob him blind
Leave him traumatized like the time you looked into your father's eyes and watched him die
It's that evil villain
Hurt people's feelings
Diss the crowd and still get more love than Serena Williams
And I'm running sh** on Youtube
You struggling with views dude?
Push me like Diaz, I'll make this battle reach a million
And if I get jerked I'ma go out swinging
So you better hope I win this
Cause I ain't having no L (noel) like a Jehovah Witness
f** the voting system and all you s**ers phony gimmicks
I am not a battle rapper, don't make me show you the business
And your breath smells like sh**
[Round 1: The Saurus]
I told him I've been crushing you for years
He said, "That's yet to be seen."
But think about it, that's not what we were lead to believe
Cause you told Hollohan he bit your lines and said them to me
Which technically means I won this sh** before you stepped in the ring
So if y'all ain't up to speed, f** it, buckle up, adjust your seats
And tell me how the f** he's not a s**a after what you see
Stop being a f*ggot Patrick, practice what you preach
Instead of acting like you s**a free, show us what the f** it means
I'll tell y'all what it doesn't mean
Talking 'bout your boy's brother being autistic then getting punked upstairs after Marv won in three
I'll tell y'all what it doesn't mean
Letting a battle come between homies just to please the type of people that are f**ing up the scene
Or standing in the background hovering
Drinking [?] ice acting like it's a cup of lean
Being a drunken piece of sh**
Disrespecting the people that run the league
Til security had to tell s**er to f**ing leave
Now you can say it's no more Mr. Nice Guy, Pat
It's no more anything now, your life line's flat
You'd burn any bridge to win a battle Pat, that's true
Even your best friend had a pact with you
And you stabbed him in the back tattoo
See nothing seems s**a free about the stuff that Pat spits
Cause he keeps chucking weak s**er punches, that's it
A bunch of cheap stuff he needs for every s**a Pat tricks
s**a free? s**a please, you can s** a fat dick
[Round 2: Pat Stay]
Now I admit, as far as battle rap goes, he's almost the reason I exist
But you're the reason why this scene has died and reason why I quit
You're the man in these people's eyes but you need to realize that aside from this
In the real world you're equivalent to a steaming pile of sh**
You're an old, broke, battle rapping, gambling addict
Man you're a f*ggot
You're such a b**h if you got f**ed by a man you'd get pregnant
Shut up, grab me a beer and go make me a sandwich
What the f** are you doing here? You got a family to take care of
You should be ashamed and embarra**ed to even make an appearance
You claim that you have a baby you cherish
But I looked in the thesaurus and-
Aww f**
You claim you have a baby you cherish but I checked the Thesaurus and your name is in there
And the words "obvious" and "blatant" "apparent" to make you a parent
{slight choke by Pat}
See The Saurus has a little girl what an awful shame
Poor girl thought his father's name is "Gone Away"
Wouldn't even recognize him if she saw his face
Plus she'd probably puke and just crawl away
While he was losing battles she was getting potty trained
Now the girl is walking straight and talking great
But one thing you will never hear your daughter say is "Happy Father's Day"
She's probably home alone right now watching Saw 3D
And eating condoms off the ground
Cause her dad's too busy battling rather than bonding with his child
The only real thing she has in common with him now
Is the fact that neither one of 'em have a father that's around
To all you young aspiring battle rappers trying to follow your dreams
If you honestly wanna succeed in life, go get a college degree
You don't wanna be Pete, a dead beat dad
So caught up with multis and schemes
That he forgot how to be a responsible adult and father with a daughter to feed
So quit bragging every battle about your long list of accomplishments
Cause battle rapping for 10 years in the same position preposterous
Stop lying to the fans and kids on the internet watching that's giving them confidence
And tell them the truth that you've just been digging a bigger ditch than your father's in
[Round 2: The Saurus]
Now he was once a man of God, St. Patrick was Catholic
But Pat sways both ways to who he's having a match with
Acting crazy like Patrick Bateman but that plan of attack switched
Cause none of your formulas won (Formula 1), you're Danica, Patrick
You can't f**ing fight you're way too tall
I'll chuck a right to break your fall
Plus I brought a rusty knife to cut you like a table saw
That is all f*ggot, one punch breaks Patrick's jaw
Getaway untraced, glove safe, Patrick Roy
Face it dawg I beat you by a lap before the race
This is the slap to wake you up and pay you back for your mistakes
I'm here to mack some shorties I can Californicate
He's here to catch his normal case of statuCorey rape
But wait y'all Pat's a boss
Just look how fast he puts out those f*ggot blogs crying after every match he lost
You a boss but how b**h you getting bosses around
I call your girl "co-pilot" she'll give me a flight to Boston now
So talk about my kid or my dad or any chick from my past
If I cared what your angles were I'd call Bishop and ask
I tried to keep this battle s**a free so I'ma get rid of this trash
Cause you're the biggest s**er here that's why you always got a stick up your a**
[Round 3: Pat Stay]
Now you were a legend back in the day
So to see you like this is so sad it's a shame
It's like watching an old limping dog just dragging it's legs
Each verse sounds like the last thing you say before pa**ing away
You're so obsessed your favorite idols are "battle" and "AIDS"
His baby's mom will send him to the store to buy his daughter some diapers
He'll come home late all awkwardly hyper
Like, "Sorry baby. I got caught in a cipher."
What are you gonna tell your daughter when you're 60 years old?
What will she hear you say?
Better start thinking now cause that's only like three years away
If he could just get his mind of it this guy's profit could skyrocket
But everything he sees he can't thinking of rhymes off it
He be rolling up to restaurants like, "Damn it I can't pick
Can I get a ham swiss, canned fish sandwich
Jammed with ranch dip, hand picked clam strips, salmon and chips" to go
And quit making all them stupid f**ing faces and hand gestures
Cause I whip mo' a** than a Klan member ancestor
Your voice is so bad you get Stan letters from Fran Drescher
And those b**h tits are so transgender you're banned from Manchester
What a crappy human amongst me
Clammy, humid and musty
Fat, stupid and ugly
Absolutely disgusting
Creepy and slimy
So greasy and shiny
If I look on your forehead and lean to the side I can see the people behind me
You talk about Bishop, get off his dick
s**ing until your neck sprain
You're his knight in shining armor huh?
Then let's play your little chess games
See a Bishop, makes crooked moves and has never ever went straight
And a knight automatically takes an L; checkmate
And your breath stinks like sh**
And your daughter's a poot
[Round 3: The Saurus]
It's funny cause I barely started to talk about Bishop yet
And the only chess reference I can make is that he has this b**h in check
And as far as my kid, you don't even know what you're talking about
My daughter's living like a queen
Why would you question my parenting f*ggot? I fathered this entire scene
Yo, but I KNEW he was gonna talk about my dad for five minutes
Huh, I won't even act surprised
I mean, that's the guy's gimmick
We can make this a Dizaster and expand the time limits
The worst thing about the Halifax explosion is that not enough of your family died in it
Now why is it that the biggest guys are always such a b**h inside?
You think I'm lying? I've given nine examples that can symbolize
And haven't even gotten to how Bishop tried to get this guy to battle
But when it was time to put up bread you quit replying
Yo, that did happen, you b**hed and whined
So I'ma end your career now
He has you so shook, you're ducking Scarborough year round
You're scared as f** his homies are here so they can jump you here now
You're so shook you won't even do f**ing coke off of a mirror now