On the windswept pavement
The moonbeams tried to pierce the night
As moaning filled the air
In the basement of the salon
It was night dark damp and dismal
I entered the room pitch black
It was full of naked women
The haircut b**hiness of them
Told me they were hair salon dropp outs
Unable to show their true colours
The dyed curly head wrong set
Unable to show their faces
They only could moan and grown
I could not find the light switch
Being a man I could not
Feel my way around
As I knelt on the ground
Oh my God
Someone is licking my face
OMG it's my own dog
In my own bed
Oh heavens I have been riding
On a night mare
Horribus dyedidus hair rising action... Cut