What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm not who I want to be
I tried spot cream an' I tried it all
I'm crawlin' up the wall
What's my name?
Name
Name
I tried to join a ping-pong club
Sign on the door said "All full up"
I got nicked, fightin' in the road
And the judge didn't even know
(Chorus)
Dad got pissed so I got clocked
Couldn't hear the Tannoy so he lost the lot
Offers Mum a bribe through the letter box
Drives you f**ing mad
Now I'm round the back of your house at night
Peepin' in the window, are you sleepin' tight?
I laugh at your locks with my celloid strip
And you won't know who came
(Chorus x2)