Haha haha hahahahahahah HAHAHAHA!
[Verse 1]
I'm on the internet, posing as a little girl
I'm tryin to lure evil into my world
I tell them that I'm curious, and I'm only 12
Mom and Dad are gone for the day, I'm by myself
Buckets of throw up are next to my computer, hopin that they show up
Cause what I'm about to do to them would make the devil sick
I sharpen my blade, frontin to this perv like I'm only in the 7th grade
The doorbell rings, I gotta get them inside!
In my best little girls voice I'm like," Hi! Come on in! I'm putting on my bikini!"
And when the door shuts, that's when I let them see me
"Hi there." (Haha) I stab him in the neck first, cause it hurts
Hit him where the blood squirts. Carve his whole face off and make him eat it
Chain him up by the foot in my basement, bleeding
[Hook (x2)]
I'm probably gonna burn for this
Ain't no lesson to learn from this
There's nothing I will earn
But it sure is fun
(To catch a predator) I said it sure is fun
(To catch a predator) And it sure is fun
(To catch a predator)
[Verse 2]
Soon enough, Feds will be shutting down my service
Cause people out there, think they don't deserve this
Until it's your kid an old man is finger f**ing! Titty s**ing!
Then you'll want the knife stuck in.
I don't blame you, that's why I catch them in advance
While his dick is still in his pants, they never get the chance
I tell them I'm alone and I'm only 13, looking for a good time
Ya know what I mean?
"Bring me some Funions, and a Slurpee. Promise not to hurt me, or give me herpes."
And within 20 minutes, here comes a f**ing doctor
Knocking on my door, a pedophile bu*t knocker
"Come in! Have a seat!" and then I stroll in
With the all purpose hunting knife straight up his Colon (Ahh!)
I cut his hands off, he ain't touching nobody
Chain him up by the foot in the basement, bloody
"Pla- pla- please Mr. Clown, sir, you don't have to do this!"
"Zip it!"
"Please! I got money!"
"Shut it f**er!"
"Please! We can work this out!"
"Silence I say!"
Stick him next to this other fool. Both left for dead
Every time I walk by, I punch them in the head
Cut they f**ing dicks off, stick em in each other's mouths
"Nooow what y'all talkin about!?"
[Hook]
"What's in the bag?"
"Funions and condoms.."
"What's in the bag?"
"Funions and condoms.."
"What's in the bag?"
"Funions and condoms.."
"Why did you bring condoms?"
"I didn't mean to.."
[Verse 3]
The house is getting funky, bodies in the basement, stinking
What the f** am I thinking?
I put my face paint on, go downstairs and beat they a** sometime
Cause it ease my mind. Some of them are dead, some are still living
But I'mma hurt them every chance that I'm given
I hit em with the nail gun, and the stun gun
They can't run! So, it's just mad fun
I was sawing a head off when I heard the doorbell
I'm not expecting any predators, but oh well!
I toke my spot. "Come in! I'll be right there!"
But I left a head sitting on the living room chair!
He seen it and ran! I had to give chase!
We cut across the lawn with my knife swinging for my face!
I threw it, it stuck him in the back of the neck
Still in my drawers, I dragged him home a bloody wreck
"Ahhhh! Somebody! Anybody!"
"Zip it!"
"Stop! Please!"
"Shut it the f** up!"
"Ahhhhhh!"
"People are looking! Silence!"
A bus for of high school kids watched it happened
He kept screaming like a pansy, despite my slapping
Plus, the neighbors seen it, and so did the mail man
But they all never said nothing bout it again
[Hook]
"Yo! Liz!"
"Meanwhile, back at the house."
"Hey! Come on in! What kind of alcohol did you bring?'
"I brought Absolute Citron, I brought Mandarin Orange, I brought a shot of Jägermeister"
"Wow!"
"In several cases, the men were asked to bring food, alcohol, and condoms. Law enforcement says this helps show an intent on solicit minor. What do we got here?"
"A bag of Funions.."
"Funions? Did you bring condoms?"
"..I did."
"You did?"