I'm still in this world, going nowhere
Days from the past brought my worst nightmares
What I desired is not what I've got
To make you mine I've f**ing fought
A thousand wars inside my head
Sometimes you live, sometimes I'm dead
I could make words rhyme but for not too long
Do I belong here? My thoughts were gone
I forced myself onto every drug I saw
Even drugged some s*uts to get along with 'em
sh**! You're gone and I'm still alone
And I miss your calls, once it kept me ON
Even now your voice thrills me much
In the way you fill the heat, you heal my heart
Even now, your touch shrills me and
Takes me high and then splits me up
Pours hope in my soul and lightening lit me. I'm
No one without you. I'm afraid of heights
For then I have further to fall. I yearn to hear you call
And then you are the voice I hear on nights and I am
Back from the dead like the knight of light
I see the brighter side. You were the blight I had
This ain't no time to fight. So, let us make this right
Alright?
You are the one I see as my wright
You made me believe I can also write
But then most of times you would false a smile
And spoke altered lies and then closed your eyes
Foster child? Yes, when you quit my heart
But you were more than what
I needed. Shots at night
So not to wake from bad
Freaking day dreams I had
Then I screamed 'WE' so loud
I need some peace and love
Back in my heart right now
Baby! You're still allowed
To break my heart. I'm proud
To be the one who loved
You and your shrouded sound
You cared me like I'mma juvenile
But you and I were like the ones who lied
In a relationship that got screwed so wild
Like a desperate child I'm f**ing crying
Can't you see my tears that shine?
My fears do hide every day you're mine
You are divine and we are equal signs
Are consequence of lies more reasons to lie?
No. But sequence of lines were drawn
Recently on this shore
And frequently pa**ing waves piquantly swept for more
The vacations we planned for yesterdays
And when you stranded 'em for a better day
In a better way for your getaway
b**h! You better get down, let the plane fly away
With you or f**ing without you
That sh**'s gonna drown in Tampa Bay
I've f**ed up it's engine. You won't find a way
To The Kingdom of Far Far Away or find a help
Kind are white whales, they will feed you kelp
And let males in 'em f** you and breed yourself
Do you need my help for some weed or bread?
To cuddle in the bed or to bleed your head?
You make me an addict, my drug I can't stop
Feel like I've combusted, I'm about to pop!
Thanks to you I'm a beat closer to d**h
I don't wanna see you dead in this sea instead
I'd rather sit and watch you f**ing suffer
Think about me, baby! I'm still that old lover
But all those beautiful days are hard to recover
Until then, my strains of love shall hover
Upon you but it's getting more and more tougher
Voilà! Found my bong and weed bag. Do you have a crusher?
I'll smoke this sh** and see the sun getting drowned in this sea
If you go deep undersea, you'll find a Judas tree
This world shall be happy, for the deceivers are free
f** the world, I will make you fall in love with me
Gonna wait til you almost drown and then save you
I don't do it for you, I do it for myself
So I bought this boat by selling all your wealth
I'm comin' for you, c*nt! You please hold your breath
Packed our bags hoping my plans won't fail
That's a blind man in driver's seat. Let's start to sail
He's f**ing eyeing you 'cause he knows the tale
He may wanna f** you as he knows details
Scream 'Hallelujah!' when he grabs your ponytail
Michael, leave her! That's my b**h. She's not for sale
s** my dick, f*ggot! And row this boat ashore
I don't like the way you f**ing call her who*e
I'm gonna take a sword and chop your balls
Oh, Jesus calls. Jordan's river will chill your soul
Rest in peace moron. Rest in peace, snitch
Change in plans, darling. I'm not gonna k** you b**h
The awesome threesome we two had
No spastic grieving for this gruesome night
I get drastic feelings in my clastic heart
Satanic I became and let magics start
I'll drag his body to that mastic tree
Bring a plastic bag and stay panic free
Organic he'll become in two months or three
He was nobody. Please don't disagree
You're not gonna call cops if you care for me
Keep that f**ing phone down and try to see
This is felony and that too first degree
We'll rot in some prison till you're seventy three
We'll see the world out as two parolees
We're human beings. You feel what I feel
We are real. We heal. f** these policies
This is prophecy said by some prodigy
Honestly, this is not an apology
We're a family and there is no agony
Eternally this will be a fantasy
Reality is what's happening. I'll spit it happily
We're a tragedy out of a fallacy
Verses of blasphemy more and more blast from me
The sun was shinning bright on spring
On 30th of Feb, you wore my ring
b**h! You who*e! You f**ing stink
More and more I think of you, I'm back to brink
Hate I had just shrinked
Scorching back to things, you and I once did
Dirty dozen kisses
f**ing swings and misses
Dike of hugs and sh**s
Like a lust beholding fish, I fought for life with bliss
I'm back in shore; Love whips
But life is more than this
My wife is like a nymph. I'm
Trying not to remember fascinating limbus
Left by her- an illness. Celebrating richness
By being bloody mistress. The day before last Christmas
When she slept with someone else's big a**
Argh! fu*k!!!
My mind whinges and cringes all my wishes
Where are my goddamn paink**ers and syringes?
I'mma wrench this window off its hinges
Injures me but I'm gonna get rid of her jinxes
My demons are alive. Thanks to this minx
I'm gonna f**ing k** her
God! Please. I hate to love and love to hate her
Then I took a driller and dragged her to our cellar
I want her to feel like me; brain-dead
Before I put a hole in her head
I f**ing made her plea to k** her
I'm pleased to be the k**er sweating in this winter
Wake up, b**h! Where is my f**ing dinner?
Aww, I can't sleep anymore. I'm starving and getting thinner
Seems like the cold wind swept away the winner
And makes me realize I'm a sinner
She used to call me a poetaster writing bathetic poems
A pathetic lunatic with no genetic problems
And I'm a fanatic bogus hiding in satanic darkness
As my heart is damn broken because of dramatic moments
See, I'm a phoenix you burnt. A love you've spurned
Kept yearning more from you always but I never learned
Now I'm gonna clean my closet, one that remained the darkest
No dreams and nightmares, no more memories as a**ets
All the doors I found I just closed
Pushed every knob but I throbbed
f**. You are back as a storm
And I trudge on verge of clouds
Calm yourself for now. Harm myself for all
Deeds I did before. I cannot behold
Roots of love that rots in my heart alone
Hatred sprouts out of pain you left atop
I was wide awake on the last day of the past year
Not to celebrate alone or scream aloud 'Happy New Year!'
I was shedding tears 'cause I'm missing you a lot dear
Couldn't sleep but my bottle of pills is always near
Even after downing two dozen pills I wonder why I am still here
I dug me a grave in my own personal hell right here
The more pills I take, the more I fear. For d**h is getting near
Then I took a sip more from this sodding beer
I can hear you yelling lullabies in my ear
I see the white light. It makes me wince; it is so bright
Oh my God! I see it, I see it crystal clear
Wait a minute, I think I should leave a note before I disappear
So, for one last time I took my writing pad
And wrote this b**hing souvenir
I know I'm a persevering a**hole gone mad
f** life. For I am finally outta here