I'm not a wealthy man, don't pay for my suntan I work out in the heat and the cold Sometimes I'd like to be the big, bad wolf 'Stead of just another sheep in the fold I hear the rich man holler 'bout the shrinking dollar And cry about a luxury tax They won't let him write off his lil' eighty-foot yacht I'd like to have a problem like that Yeah, I'd like to have a problem like that Should I buy the Porsche or the stretch Cadillac Do I wanna drive fast or just ride around in the back I'd like to have a problem like that I saw a celebrity talkin' on the T.V. He looked like a tall Tom Cruise He's seeing Sheila and Bambi, Linda and Candy They're burning both ends of his fuse He says he's suffocating, he needs a vacation
From all the kissing and hugging, the sweet talk and loving I'd like to have a problem like that Oh, I'd like to have a problem like that Be a one-man woman juggling act How many can you keep in the air before you lose track I'd like to have a problem like that I'd like to be too rich, I'd to be too thin I'd like to be too young, I'd like to be too in Should I kiss and tell, write a book on my life And how much can I get for the movie rights Oh, I'd like to have a problem like that Be a tabloid star at the checkout rack Should I drag 'em through court Or tell 'em to kiss my fax I'd like to have a problem like that Give me those problems I think that I could solve 'em I'd like to have a problem like that