[Verse 1]
Oh, the tree in my garden fell down
Lamppost hit me, attacked by a kitty
Oh, they released the hounds
Door fell on me, lost my teddy
[Bridge]
My luck is fading away
More and more every day
[Hook]
I don't know why I'm so unlucky
It's never been this way before
I don't think that I've been this fat
Since I was three of four
[Verse 2]
Oh, lost my job today
Never ever once got payed
Oh, my DVD player broke
Dog's on fire, tripped over a wire
[Bridge]
[Hook]
[Verse 1 Reprise]
[Hook x2]