I've got thirty-six expressions Sweet as pie to tough as leather And that's six expressions more then all them, heh, Barrymores put together Instead of just kicking me Why don't they give me a lift Well, heh, it must be a plot Cause they're scared that I got Such a gift Well I'm miffed Cause I'm the greatest star I am by far But no one knows it Wait! They're gonna hear a voice A silver flute Hoo ho hoo, hoo ho hoo They'll cheer each toot (Hey, I hear it's terrific hmm) When I expose it Now can't ya see to look at me that I'm a natural Camille As Camille I just feel I've so much to offer Hey listen kid I know I'd be divine because I'm a natural cougher (coughs) Some aint got it not a lump I'm a great big clump of talent Laugh, ahahahaha They'll bend in half (Did you ever hear the story of the traveling sales man) A thousand jokes Stick around for the jokes A thousand faces I reiterate When you're gifted then you're gifted These are facts I've got no axe to grind Hey! What're you blind
In all of the world so far I'm the greatest star No autographs please! Do you think beautiful girls are gonna be a star forever I should say not Any minute now they're gonna be out Finished! And then it'll be my turn Who is the pip with pi-zaz Who is all ginger and jazz Who is as glamorous as Who's an American beauty rose With an American beauty nose And ten American beauty toes Eyes on the target and wham One shot, one gun shot and bam Hey Mr. Katie Here I am I'm the greatest star I am by far But no one knows it That's why I was born I'll blow my horn Till someone blows it I'll light up like a light Right up like a light I'll flicker then flare up All the world's gonna stare up Looking down you'll never see me Try the sky cause that'll be me I can make 'em cry I can make 'em sigh Someday the clamor for my dram-er Have you guessed yet Who's the best yet If you aint I'll tell ya one more time You bet your last dime In all of the world so far I am the greatest, greatest star