[Intro]
You know, I just don't get it
Last year I was nobody, this year I'm selling records
Now everybody wants to come around
Like I owe 'em something
The f** you want from me, 10 million dollars?
Get the f** outta here!
[Hook]
You see, I'm just Marshall Mathers
I'm just a regular guy
I don't know why all the fuss about me
Nobody ever gave a f** before
All they did was doubt me
Now everybody wanna run their mouth
And try to take shots at me
[Verse 1]
You might see me joggin', you might see me walkin'
You might see me walking a dead Rottweiler dog
With its head chopped off in the park with a spiked collar
Hollering at him ‘cause the son of a b**h won't quit barkin'
Or leaning out a window with a co*ked shotgun
Driving up the block in the car that they shot Pac in
Looking for Big's k**ers, dressing ridiculous
Blue and red, like I don't see what the big deal is
Double barrel 12-gauge bigger than Chris Wallace
Pissed off ‘cause Biggie and Pac just missed all this
Watching all these cheap imitations get rich off 'em
And get dollars that should've been theirs
Like they switched wallets
And amidst all this Crist' popping and wrist watches
I just sit back and just watch and just get nauseous
And walk around with an empty bottle of Remy Martin
Starting sh** like some 26-year-old skinny Cartman
An anti-Backstreet and Ricky Martin
Whose instinct's to k** N'Sync, don't get me started
These f**ing brats can't sing and Britney's garbage
What is this b**h, retarded? Give me back my sixteen dollars
All I see is sissies in magazines smilin'
Whatever happened to wiling out and being violent?
Whatever happened to catching a good old-fashioned pa**ionate a**-whoopin'
And getting your shoes coat and your hat tooken
[Bridge]
New Kids on the Block s**ed a lot of dick
Boy/girl groups make me sick
And I can't wait 'til I catch all you f*ggots in public
I'ma love it
[Verse 2]
Vanilla Ice don't like me, said some sh** in Vibe to spite me
Then went and dyed his hair just like me
A bunch of little kids wanna swear just like me
And run around screaming, "I don't care, just bite me!"
I think I was put here to annoy the world
And destroy your little four-year-old boy or girl
Plus I was put here to put fear in f*ggots who spray Faygo Root Beer and call themselves clowns ‘cause they look queer
f*ggy 2 Dope and Silent Gay
Claiming Detroit, when y'all live 20 miles away
And I don't wrestle, I'll knock you f**ing f*ggots the f** out
Ask 'em about the club they was at when they snuck out
After they ducked out the back
When they saw us and bugged out
Ducked down and got paintballs shot at they truck – blaow!
Look at y'all running your mouth again
When you ain't seen a f**ing mile road south of 10
And I don't need help from D12 to beat up two females
In make-up who may try to scratch me with Lee Nails
Slim an*s? You damn right, slim an*s
I don't get f**ed in mine like you two little flaming f*ggots
[Hook 2]
‘Cause I'm just Marshall Mathers
I'm not a wrestler guy
I'll knock you out if you talk about me
Come and see me on the streets alone
If you a**holes doubt me
And if you wanna run your mouth
Then come take your best shot at me
[Verse 3]
Is it because you love me that y'all expect so much of me?
You little groupie b**h, get off me, go f** Puffy!
Now because of this blonde mop that's on top
Of this f**ed up head that I've got I've gone pop
The underground just spunned around and did a 360
Now these kids diss me and act like some big sissies
"Oh, he just did some sh** with Missy, so now he thinks he's too big to do some sh** with MC Get-Bizzy"
My f**ing b**h mom's suing for 10 million
She must want a dollar for every pill I've been stealin'
sh**, where the f** you think I picked up the habit?
All I had to do was go in her room and lift up her mattress
Which is it, b**h: Mrs. Briggs or Ms. Mathers?
It doesn't matter, [your attorney Fred Gibson's a] f*ggot
Talking about I fabricated my past
He's just aggravated I won't ejaculate in his a**
So tell me, what the hell is a fella to do?
For every million I make, another relative sues
Family fighting and fussing
Over who wants to invite me to supper
All of a sudden, I got ninety-some cousins
A half-brother and sister who never seen me
Or even bothered to call me until they saw me on TV
Now everybody's so happy and proud
I'm finally allowed to step foot in my girlfriend's house (Hey!)
And then to top it off I walked to the news stand
To buy this cheap-a** little magazine with a food stamp
Skipped to the last page, flipped right fast
And what do I see? A picture of my big white a**
Okay, let me give you mothaf**as some help
Um, here, "XXL! XXL!"
Now your magazine shouldn't have so much trouble to sell
Ahh, f** it, I'll even buy a couple myself
[Hook]
You see, I'm just Marshall Mathers
I'm just a regular guy
I don't know why all the fuss about me
Nobody ever gave a f** before
All they did was doubt me
Now everybody wanna run their mouth
And try to take shots at me