[Intro]
Yeah, haha, whoo, sh**
(Aight, guess what? I ain't coming in yet
I'll come in a minute
Ayo, this is my love song, it goes like this)
[Verse 1]
Back when Mark Wahlberg was Marky Mark (f**ing f*ggot!)
This is how we used to make the party start
We used to mix Hen with Bacardi Dark
And when it, kicks in you can hardly talk
And by the, sixth gin you're gon' probably crawl
And you'll be, sick then and you'll probably barf
And my pre-diction is you're gon' probably fall
Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall
And everything's spinnin', you're beginnin' to think women
Are swimmin' in pink linen again in the sink
Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guinness is finished
You are now allowed to officially slap b**hes
You have the right to remain violent and start wilin'
Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyein' you
Get in your car, start it, and start drivin'
Over the island and cause a 42-car pile-up
(Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot
Looking for life on this planet, sir, no sign of it
All I can see is a bunch of smoke flyin'
And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it
Let me outta this place, I'm outta place
I'm in outer space, I've just vanished without a trace
I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow
I'll be back in an hour or so)
[Hook]
‘Cause every time I go to try to leave
Something keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These d** really got a hold of me
‘Cause every time I try to tell 'em "no"
They won't let me ever let 'em go
I'm a s**er all I gotta say
These d** really got a hold of me
[Verse 2]
In third grade, all I used to do
Was sniff glue through a tube and play Rubik's Cube
17 years later I'm as rude as Jude
Schemin' on the first chick with the hugest b**bs
I've got no game, and every face looks the same
They've got no name, so I don't need game to play
I just say whatever I want to whoever I want
Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want
However, I do show some respect to few
This ecstasy's got me standin' next to you
Getting sentimental as f**, spillin' guts to you
We just met, but I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too, so you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like, "Yo, what the f** we do?"
I gotta go, b**h, you know I got stuff to do
‘Cause if I get caught cheatin' then I'm stuck with you
But in the long run, these d** are probably going
To catch up sooner or later, but f** it, I'm on one
So let's enjoy, let the X destroy your spinal cord
So it's not a straight line no more
'Til we walk around looking like some wind-up dolls
sh**'s stickin' outta our backs like a dinosaur
sh**, six hits won't even get me high no more
So bye for now, I'm going to try to find some more
[Hook]
‘Cause every time I go to try to leave
Something keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These d** really got a hold of me
‘Cause every time I try to tell 'em "no"
They won't let me ever let 'em go
I'm a s**er all I gotta say
These d** really got a hold of me
[Verse 3]
That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow
When you swallow it all wallow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow you're probably gonna wanna do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend?
Screw it! And what's a little bit of alcohol poisonin'?
And what's a little fight? Tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life, live it however you wanna
Mar-a-ju-on-na is everywhere, where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're goin'
‘Cause none of this sh**'s gonna mean sh** where we're goin'
They tell you to stop, but you just sit there ignorin'
Even though you wake up feeling like sh** every mornin'
But you're young, you've got a lot of d** to do
Girls to screw, parties to crash, s**s to be you
If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't
I would have did more sh** that people said that I shouldn't
But I'm all grown up now and upgraded
And graduated to better d** and updated
But I still got a lotta growing up to do
I still got a whole lotta throwing up to spew
But when it's all said and done I'll be 40
Before I know it with a 40 on the porch tellin' stories
With a bottle of Jack, two grandkids in my lap
Babysitting for Hailie while Hailie's out getting smashed
[Hook]
‘Cause every time I go to try to leave
Something keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These d** really got a hold of me
‘Cause every time I try to tell 'em "no"
They won't let me ever let 'em go
I'm a s**er all I gotta say
These d** really got a hold of me