[Hook]
I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes
[Verse 1]
Lately I really feel like I'm rolling for delph, like Philly
Feel like I'm losing control of myself, I sincerely
Apologize if all that I sound like is I'm complaining
But life keeps on complicating
And I'm debating on leaving this world this evening
Even my girls can see I'm grieving, I try and hide it, but I can't
Why do I act like I'm all high and mighty
When inside I'm dying?
I am finally realizing I need help, I can't do it myself, too weak
Two weeks I've been having ups and downs
Going through peaks and valleys, dilly-dallying
Around with the idea of ending the sh** right here
I'm hating my reflection
I walk around the house trying to fight mirrors
I can't stand what I look like, yeah
I look fat, but what do I care?
I give a f**, only thing I fear is Hailie
I'm afraid if I close my eyes I might see her… sh**
[Hook]
[Verse 2]
I lock myself in the bedroom, bathroom, napping at noon
Yeah, Dad's in a bad mood, he's always snapping at you
Marshall, what happened that you…
You can't stop with these pills?
And you've fallen off with your sk**s
And your own fans are laughing at you
It become a problem you're too p**y to tackle? Get up
Be a man, stand, a real man would've had this sh** handled
Know you just had your heart ripped out and crushed
They say Proof just flipped out
Homie just whipped out and bust
Nah, it ain't like Doody to do that
He wouldn't f**ing shoot at nobody, he fights first
But dwelling on it only makes the night worse
Now I'm popping Vics, Percs and Methadone pills
"Yeah, Em, tight verse, you k**ed it"
f**ing drug dealers hang around me like yes men
And they gonna do whatever I says when I says it
It's in their best interest to protect their investment
And I just lost my f**ing best friend
So f** it, I guess then…
[Hook (with Eminem)]
(Don't know what I'm going through
But I just keep on going through changes)
[Verse 3]
My friends can't understand this new me
That's understandable, man, but think how bananas you'd be
You'd be an animal too
If you were trapped in this fame and caged in it like a zoo
And everybody's looking at you, what you want me to do?
I'm starting to live like a recluse
And the truth is fame starting to give me an excuse
To be at an all-time low
I sit alone in my home theater, watching the same damn DVD
Of the first tour, the last tour, he was still alive
And it hurts so I fast forward
Sleeping pills'll make me feel alright
And if I'm still awake in the middle of the night
I'll just take a couple more, yeah, you're motherf**ing right
I ain't slowing down for no one, I am almost homeward bound
Almost in a coma, yeah, homie, c'mon, dole 'em out
"Daddy, don't you die on me; Daddy, better hold your ground!"
f**, don't I know the sound of that voice?
Yeah, baby, hold me down
[Hook (with Eminem)]
[Verse 4]
Wake up in the hospital, full of tubes
But somehow I'm pulling through
Swear when I come back I'ma be bulletproof
I'ma do it just for Proof, I think I should state a few facts cause I may not get a chance again to say the truth
sh** it just hit me that what if I would not have made it through
I think about the things I would've never got to say to you
I'd never get to make it right, so here's what I came to do
Hailie, this one is for you, Whitney and Alaina too
I still love your mother, that'll never change
Think about her every day, we just could never get it together
Hey, wish there was a better way for me to say it
But I swear on everything, I'd do anything for her on any day
There are just too many things to explain
When it rains guess it pours, yes it does
Wish there wasn't any pain, but I can't pretend there ain't
I ain't placing any blame, I ain't pointing fingers
Heaven knows I've never been a saint
I know that it feels like we just pissed away our history
And just today, I looked at your picture, almost as if to say
I miss you subconsciously, wish it didn't end this way
But I just had to get away, don't know why
I don't know what else to say, I guess I'm…
[Hook (with Eminem)]