[Intro]
Oh! It's music to my ears!
Oh, man
How can I describe... The way I feel?
f**ing great, man
Ok, let me see
How can I begin?
[Verse 1]
Locked in Mariah's wine cellar all I had for lunch
Was bread, wine, more bread, wine and Captain Crunch
Red wine for breakfast and for brunch
And to soak it up an in-between snack crackers to munch
Mariah whatever happened to us? Why did we have to break up?
All I asked for was a gla** of punch!
You see I never really asked for much
I can't imagine what's going through your mind after such
A nasty break-up with that Latin hunk
Luis Miguel Nick Cannon better back the f**
Up, I'm not playin', I want her back, you punk
This is Hello Kitty bedspread satin funk
Mixed with Egyptian with a little rap and punk
Zapp and Eric Clapton, Shaft, Frank Zappa, crunk
And yeah baby I want another crack at ya
You can beat me with any spatula that you want
I mean I really want you bad, you c*nt
Nick you had your fun, I've come to kick you in your sack of junk
Man I could use a fresh batch of blood
So prepare your vernacular for Dracula acupuncture
[Hook]
Bagpipes from Baghdad
When will it ever cease
For Pete's sakes he's crazy to say the least
Bagpipes from Baghdad
What's goin through my mind
Half the time when I rhyme we're blowin up like
Bagpipes from Baghdad
Somebody turn the vacancy sign on
Cause I'm gone, blowing up my
Bagpipes from Baghdad
I run the streets and act
Like a madman holdin a Glad bag
[Verse 2]
You can be a permanent fixture in my lyrical mixture
I'm the miracle whip... trickster
My signature sound when a tube of lipstick's around
I'm bound to put it on in an instant, wow man
What an ensemble, what an a**ortment of pharma-
-ceuticals this beautiful pill dust in my palm, my
Cuticles get residue just from touchin the bottle
Never knew I could remind me so much of my momma
I'll cut ya like Dahmer, pull the butcher knife on ya
The size of a sword boy I'm like the f**in Red Sonja
Get it stuck in your cornea, nice knowin ya, Norman
You're so f**in' annoyin', drop the shovel boy
You don't know what the f** you're doin
I ain't playin' no f**in' more
Nick Cannon, you prick, I wish you luck with the f**in' who*e
Every minute there's a s**er born, snuck up on
Malachi made the motherf**er s** on a shuck of corn
Shuck of, shuck of corn, Chaka Khan
Hit Jason in the face with a hockey puck and told him it's f**ing on
Man what the f** are ya doin'
You're runnin over the snowblower with the lawnmower
Blowin' your bagpipes from Baghdad
[Hook]
Bagpipes from Baghdad
When will it ever cease
For Pete's sakes he's crazy to say the least
Bagpipes from Baghdad
What's goin through my mind
Half the time when I rhyme we're blowin up like
Bagpipes from Baghdad
Somebody turn the vacancy sign on
Cause I'm gone, blowing up my
Bagpipes from Baghdad
I run the streets and act
Like a madman holdin a Glad bag
[Verse 3]
In the bed with two brain dead lesbian vegetables
I bet you they become heteros**ual
Nothing will stop me from molestin' you
Titty-f**in' you til' your breast nipple flesh tickles my testicles
Is what they said to the two conjoined twins
How's it going girlfriends, you need a boyfriend
You need some ointment, just set up an appointment
Who's gonna see the doctor first, we'll do a coin flip
I just got my one-year sobriety coin chip
When the bad get goin, how bad does the going get
Baby you shouldn't have any trouble rubbin groins wit
Each other especially when you're joined at the hip
I'm going to get the needle and thread from the sewing kit
An attempt to separate 'em and stitch 'em back at the loins, sh**
Lure the little boy with the chocolate chips ahoy! chip-
Cookie lookie even took me a Polaroid flick
[Hook]
Bagpipes from Baghdad
When will it ever cease
For Pete's sakes he's crazy to say the least
Bagpipes from Baghdad
What's goin through my mind
Half the time when I rhyme we're blowin up like
Bagpipes from Baghdad
Somebody turn the vacancy sign on
Cause I'm gone, blowing up my
Bagpipes from Baghdad
I run the streets and act
Like a mad man holdin' a glad bag of
Bagpipes from Baghdad
[Outro]
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