We should all go back to church cos they've hit the market place
They're getting fashionable ideas from back issues of "The Face"
They've bought part shares in the pill, p**n videos
And guns, GUNS, GUNS!
I LIKE IT!!
Old concepts are boring the designer ma** is fun
They've changed the local parishes into saunas, gyms and spas
The Eucharist and the Convenant is now a mini-bar
They've bought a New York decorator to turn cherubs into fairies
The body and the blood to caviar and Bloody Marys
While the font is a Jacuzzi and holy water's Perrier
Cos the Vatican has found a way to make religion pay
If you've soiled your conviction, sold your soul
All you need is absolution, get some good Rock n Roll
Let my people go, go, go to church - listen to the preacher
Go to church - he'll teach you more than Fredrick Neitzsche
Go to church - where you can let your hair hang down, down, down
No need to be embarra**ed cause there's no-one else around
The parish priests are trying to make lay-people of your daughters
Installing water beds as their sacrificial altars
Parents are concerned but nothing could be safer
Cos your girl won't get pregnant if she's chewing on the wafer
And while I'm on the topic did I forget to mention?
The Brother Joe rides piggyback with dubious intentions
And Amy Grant's has songs that have you coming in your socks
While pre pubescent school boys try to pillage her poor-box
The flying nun with see through frocks and s**y lingerie
Now they've turned the sacred sacrament into a cabaret
Let my people go, go, go to church - that's what my mother used to say
Go to church - or you will rue the day
Go to church - where you can see all the pretty people
If you've never been before it's the building with the steeple
The ma** was best in Latin, they never should have banned it
It doesn't make sense now that we can understand it
Socer uno servo fetum, Lefevre's not a f*ggot
But if he don't take care he'll get laid, he'll get laid
He'll get laid off like Jimmy Swaggert
Admission is free if you're certain of your fate
If not I recommend some big cash on the plate
Or get a damn good lawyer to change the ref's decision
Cos I'm stuck with going to church like I'm stuck with circumcision
Let my people go, go, go to church - cause you might find favor
Go to church - throw your arms to the savior
Go to church - it's getting warm and I can hear that final bell
You'd better move your feet there's no fire escape in Hell
Come on all you s**ually impotent, drunken, drug-pushing
Scumbags.... Go to church!