The lock slides on the closet door
What shall I throw on today?
Maybe a b**b tube and some dungarees
And a waistcoat of self hate
I need a way to look like sh**
That looks downtrodden and yet expensive
And then the transphobes
Will have me disrobed
Oh we are the Trans Glitterati
And we never used to be this damn gaudy
Yeah we are the Trans Glitterati
And we're coming for your feelz
Oh and our pants are non binary
And our souls are well heeled in refinery
Horn rims with no gla** but we can't see
With our heads between our knees
I was one thing but now I'm not
Now I'm neither, now I'm both
I don't care about your chromosomes
Or your hippocratic oath
I'm better than the average man
Who just wears t shirts and stained sweat pants
I want the cat calls
But stay away from my balls
Oh we are the Trans Glitterati
The disillusioned illuminati
Yeah what's your stance on zucchinis?
Are they quasiplatonic?
Oh we are the Trans Glitterati
So you don't get free speech
Yeah we're freelancing for Stalin
In the style of Mugabe
(In the style of Mugabe)
(Do me like Kony)
I don't quite feel a hundred percent
So I must be a second cla** citizen
Now when will you sh**lords
Give me my award?
Oh we are the Trans Glitterati
And I'm pretty sure that means we're just squaddies
For the necromancer society
In the college of your dreams
I'm Gorilla kin and you capped me
Where'd you think you are, Cincinnati?
Yeah we are the Trans Glitterati
We're whatever we can't be
Don't you wanna trans? He's not a baby
Don't you wanna trans? He's not a boy
Don't you wanna trans? Everybody in!
We're trans hermaphrodite kin
Are you FTM? Are you MTF?
Are MTM? Are you FTF?
RULGBQTOMG
f**in WTFU