[Verse 1]
I had dreams of starring in spaghetti westerns
I'd be Clint Eastwood
But he's tough, and better dressed
But luckily for me
There is a way to live my fantasy
The Red Dead franchise
Will let me be that man for cheap
My own family won't even know me
I'm Dan Houser meets Sergio Leone
I saw the trailer for the game
And thought my brain would fall away
It made my morning great
Tore away the ball and chain
I say i'm Dan Houser meets Sergio Leone
Now hang about a moment
While I saddle up my pony
I'm ready to roam
Into the desert alone
Stepping into the unknown
Heading in westward ho
Ahead of the heather the zephyr has blown
I'm there for the treasure, the throne
Whenever I get it I'm setting off home
To my homestead
Where i'd better declare my intention to own
Red Dead Redemption
But wait
What did we forget to mention?
A simultaneous release on Steam?
No intention
But why do you feel the need
To tease the PC players?
To keep us waiting is the cheapest sales technique
The same as GTA is
So yet again the Steam train's been delayed
Come on, Rockstar
That's a cheeky way to treat a mate
Yeah, make us pay upon the day you brought it out once
Then port to PC after about
Ooh
Twelve months
Back in the 90's you guys were PC pioneers
The kind i'd like to buy a beer
Here's my shoulder, cry a tear
Now you provide a new title every five years
On proprietary gear
Just let me buy it here
See, i'm Dan Houser meets Sergio Leone
If Sergio Leone was only owned by Sony
[Outro]
Fkin' blow me
I'm sorry I said that