Woke up this morning like a normal person do
In the middle of an intersection, face first in a bag o glue
Car full of empties and I'm leakin' somethin' stinkin'
Don't get silly copper, I know that beer ain't drinkin'
Rabbit don't sit around tryin' to have fur
Bees too beezy buzzin' to wonder what fir
Though it's nothin', drink enough get fuzzy, buzzed and freakin'
Tell 'em Country Dick told ya beer ain't drinkin'
Life really bites
Dry's 'jes a lie
Get some normal stuff or I'll have to find someone else to drive
I'm rockin' in the back pew
Gettin' busy with some home brew
Hold yer tongues preacher, I got some more toastin' up to do
My momma's in the choir and pappy is a deacon
Hell, even Ma and Pa know that beer ain't drinkin'
Dumb ol' Mojo thinks that I'm singin' every time I bubble up
Beer ain't drinkin'
Don't eat the cans kids
Whew-wee! I can drunk you all outta the table
You were never my friends
I'm blurring at you not wid you
What's all this wet gunk I'm sittin' in
Let's go to what's her name's house
I'll drive, where's my pants?