Nigel suggested together we get everyone together to watch the big game. I said, “Nigel Smart idea!” James Hird us talking and said, “Austinn Jones got some good looking friends. They'll come too.” The doorbell rang about midday. I said to the twins, “Shane and Darryl Wakelin! Our first guests are here.”
You should have seen big Barry Hall a couple of slabs through the door. Jonathan Hay, he brought a great looking young lady. She gave Kev a dirty look and Thorn said, “Kevin Sheedy-spises you!” Gary responded, “She's nothing but a Hawthorn.”
Josh thought Frank might come over. Gary said, “No way Josh Francou just got out of prison? We don't want him here.” Gary Ayres his opinions pretty strongly. Josh had seen Frank at the pawn broker with Garry Hocking some electrical gear. Everyone knows Matthew Nicks the stuff and gives Adam Goodes he can't get rid of!
Our Russian neighbour Yuri rolled up in his new car. Tony said, “Nice Mercuri!” I thought yeah, Tony Shaw, you just want to drive it! Yuri threw him the keys and said, “When you're done, Tony Lockett!” As we're watching David Parkin his car, Ronnie Burns past and nearly cleans up the lot of us
Things started getting out of hand. Lee stripped off all his gear and started riding Nathan like a horse. You should have seen Nathan Buckley clean across the room! And Lee soon chased after Donald Dickie flapping everywhere
Simon was pissing himself laughing. I said, “Simon Cox in the living room are unacceptable!” He was still laughing when David King hit him. While Brendon Lade out the table, Lin pa**ed around the Burger Rings. Liam couldn't make up his mind and Lin said, “For God's sakes, Liam Pickering!”
You should have seen Michael Tuck in and Nigel and Matthew Lappin it up. Fletcher got crumbs all over himself while my mum was busy Dustin Fletcher. Shane grabbed the bag and scoffed the lot. Mum said, “Shane Woewoedin-ner will be on soon, so chill out mate!”
We like to guess who'll be best on ground. I said to Mum, "Can Nicky Winmar?" She said, "He's not even playing. Anyway, we should let Byron Pickett!" Kay wanted to let Ken Judge, he always goes the bloody obvious. I said, “Dhurrkay!”
So it was Carlton versus Adelaide. I said, “Brad Wira good thing today!” I suggested Wayne put on a bet, but really what would Wayne Carey's got more no's than President Eddie! But the Blues got belted and while we'd seen Matthew Hogg the remote control all afternoon, Ben finally switched to SBS and a show about French transvestites. I said, “Ben Dixon chicks isn't my bag. Tim Watson Channel Nine?"
It was a swimsuit model search but our Asian mate Stephen Tin wasn't at all interested. Shannon asked, “Is Stephen Tingay or something?” I said, “The bloke deserves a bit of privacy, Shannon Grant him that much. Look over there, doesn't Glenn Lovett?"
The crowd thinned and just after Matthew Bode us farewell, the mobile rang. It was Jana, wanting to know if the party was still going. “It's over,” I said. “We'll catch you next week for the Footyana!”
Thank you very much!