Look, was never lyrical but read a couple books
Was more than criminal I empathized with crooks
Life give the minimal so scraps is what we took, s
O when it's critical no time to be shook
Ain't say I'm hood but my neighbors ain't invite me in
Made them uncomfortable I used to wish for lighter skin
I used to hate myself my mind was sick is my defense
Low self-esteem not aligning more with righteous men
Since Tiwanne died my mind kind of switched
Another homicide lied on the dry cement
I couldn't even cry all I wanted was revenge
Some wounds never heal, even time couldn't fix
The tide I'm against in a ship ready to capsize
In troubled water's I guess I'm getting baptized
As for forgiveness for every time that I backslide
Would be a miracle drown in hate for the last time
[Chorus]
Holding back tears, going back years
Ain't want to feel pain, I let go of that fear
I been holding back tears (repeat 2x)
Look, was never any good with matters of the heart
Don't hand me yours if you been fragile from the start
Not sk**ed in discipline or mastering the art
Designer fabrics are more flattering with scars
I'm a flawed man, ah man
Look, glad my salvation wasn't left into y'all hands
If you ain't never had to scrape, scratch or crawl man
I don't need your opinion cause you an off brand
Now try and picture my frame of mind
Portraits develop in dark rooms it's taking time
A fine craft on display with a great design
Often at a loss for words but I can make it rhyme
I'm guess I'm saying that I'm on a soul search
And when all that glitters ain't gold barely denotes worth
Numb the pain the liquor says that it don't hurt
Holding back tears I pray to God that I don't burst
[Chorus]
[2nd Chorus]
Bear the burden, share the sermon
Tell the truth then, share my purpose
The times now it's never been more urgent (2x)
I been holding back tears