Alias (USA) - Inspiration's Pa**ing lyrics

(Audio sample of mother talking to child) [Verse 1: Alias] I remember sitting, watching through the haze Amazed by her, "I long for those surreal days Of inspiration in human form" Is my realization upon thought now How I wish to view myself in third person stance For a refreshing of the memory, how I long to return I now sit in a parked car, looking at that house Wishing I could enter, but it's not possible Perhaps when I return from my travels that sign will be there But at present time, I'm stuck with memories of her Especially since I'm so involved with music She's one reason I've evolved She's one reason why my brother can pick up an instrument And learn it in a matter of minutes How to play I can recall her vividly teaching me chopsticks At the age of five and dancing around the table With my sister to the tune of "Yellow Bird" The way she played I thought I was that yellow bird Flying around that table, floating, I felt so alive I felt so young and care-free, so care-free If she only knew the impact on me Sitting next to her and listenting at an early age helped me I believe that by her doing that, and having me read along Instilled the value of knowing Knowing things that helped me Use my imagination [Verse 2: Alias] Now imagine having inspiration taken away in the winter I ask you what is more depressing Me left guessing where to go next, and feeling lost It's funny how the pain has stopped But it only just begun Strange how it was transferred directly to my soul from hers And now I'm a different person, I just realized You've never been overwhelmed with sadness Until you've heard "Amazing Grace" echo off the walls of a church You used to frequent with whom the song is being played for I heard that song in a whole new light that snowy mid-winter morning And now I'm mourning my inspiration's pa**ing Numb with emotions and I'm left asking "Why?" As the snow fell I fell into my seat Tears fell from my eyes My heart fell to my feet The fairness in all of this was non-existent But relieved by the fact that our relationship was quite persistent I thought I caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of my eye As father asked us to bow our heads And I'm guessing That was her way of saying Her last goodbye