Put on your yamulke It's time for Chanukah Once again it's onaka The miracle of Chanukah Chanukah is the Festival of Lights One day of presents? Hell, no, we get Eight Crazy Nights But if you fell like the only kid in town without a Christmas tree I guess my first two songs didn't do it for you So here comes number three Ross and Phoebe from Friends say the Chanukah blessing So does Lenny's pall Squiggy and Will and Grace's Debra Messing Melissa Gilbert and Michael Landon never mix meat with dairy Maybe they shoulda called that show Little Kosher House on the Prairie? We've got Jerry Lewis, Ben Stiller and Jack Black Tom Arnold converted to Judaism but you guys can have him back We may not get to kiss underneath the mistletoe But we can do it all night long with Deuce Bigelow I'm Jewish Put on your yamulke, here comes Chanukah The guy in Willie Nelson's band who plays harmoniaca Celebrates Chanukah Osama Bin Laden Not a big fan of the Jews Well maybe that 's because he lost a figure-skating match to gold medalist Sarah Hughes-Her mama's Jewish Houdini and David Blaine escape strait jackets with such precision But the one thing they could not get out of-their painful circumcision Gwyneth Paltrow's half-Jewish but a full-time Oscar winner Jennifer Connely's half Jewish, too, and I'd like to put some more in her There's Lou Reed, Perry Farrel, Beck and Paula Abdul Joey Ramone invented punk rock music, but first came Hebrew school Hey, Natalie Portmanika? It's time to celebrate Chanukah? I hope you get an abtronika On this joyful, toyful Chanukah So get a high colonika And soil your long Johnikas If you really, really wannaka? Have a happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy,... Happy Chanukah!